Seoul Sara

Annyoung!

2008-08-07T09:24:00.002+08:00

After six years of blogging, it seems that it's finally time to call it quits. I haven't updated in months and, while I still have stories to tell, I no longer feel I need to tell them here.

Today is my last day in Korea and it hasn't hit me yet. I'm sitting here in my empty apartment wondering where the year went. It was a long year. And a hard year. There were absolutely fantastic things about this past year and other things that left me lower than low.

I've spent the past two and a half years here in Asia and now I'm heading back to Canada to try my hand at "real" teaching. This coming year will be tough. Teaching jobs are few and far between in the cities and everyone wants in. But, you've got to start somewhere and that's what I'm going to do.

Keep your fingers crossed for me and, who knows, maybe I'll be back with more adventure stories some day soon.

Blog-worthy

2008-06-04T18:57:00.003+08:00

This week in middle school we're studying Lesson 5: How MP3 Files Work. In theory, the textbook authors are brilliant. They've created a topic that will capture the interest of "today's youth". In practice, try teaching students who answer the question "How are you today" with "I'm 14 years old" about "downloading" "copyright" and "convert a file".

However, in reviewing the worksheets students used for a debate in class, I found a small gem that reminds me why teaching can be great.

The topic of the debate was: It is impossible to stop file sharing, so music and film industries should not try to do so.

The student said:

I agree with file sharing. Because there are two reasons. At first, it can help an access of people to the culture. Many people, especially the poor, can't access to the culture easily because they have to pay a lot. File sharing helps people to access to the the culture and improve their culture level.
Second, we cannot stop file sharing. There are billions of file sharing network. If we try to stop file sharing, it must be a waste of time. Instead, we should work hard to develop other forms of products that can compete with file sharing network.
In these reasons, I agree with file sharing. I know it's illegal but some people have to sacrifice for the more good.

Finally, something news worthy!

2008-04-15T19:41:00.003+08:00

In Grade 3 this week, we're practicing the sentence structure "Have you ever heard of ____" and "I can't believe it! What else can you tell me about him/her?"

Using the textbook example with Paul Bunyan (and this only begins to highlight my problems with the middle school textbook), the students had to create their own dialogue using a famous person from Korea or abroad.

Just incase that's too small to read, the dialogue is as follows:

A: Have you ever heard of Sara?

B: Sara? No. Who's that?

A: She is a teacher in Noil middle school. She is good at teaching.

B: I can't believe it! What else can you tell me about her?

A: Well, she is more beautiful than any teacher in Noil middle school.

Suwon Folk Village

2008-03-07T19:36:00.003+08:00

Last week, Kelly, Richard and I spent much too long on Line 1 travelling to Suwon to go to a Korean folk village. The village itself is actually a 30 minute bus ride outside of Suwon city but the trip was worth it.

Richard got tired of carrying his camera around so he gave it to Kelly. She managed to capture the day with a grand total of 500 pictures.

There were traditional acrobats and numerous kimchi pots along with too much spring mud.

It was the most successful day trip yet... we'll ignore the fact that it's been the only day trip yet.

Kimchi Pots

2008-03-02T21:10:00.002+08:00

JimJilBang: A Trip to the Spa

2008-02-29T10:01:00.004+08:00

After a morning spent perusing the Yongsan electronics market and a lunch of on kim bap (Korean sushi) and kimchi jjigae (spicy cabbage soup), it was decided that the only thing that could possibly conclude this very ‘Korean’ day would be a trip to the sauna.

Now, if you remember my first Korean sauna experience, you’ll recall the whole the only-clothes-your-wearing-is-your-birthday-suit “thing” about Korean saunas. I was feeling confident, though, and determined to push through with the whole thing. We had done our research, this was a 10 000won sauna (approximately $10.00) so it was pretty much guaranteed to be a good one.

After a few minutes of standing facing my locker, avoiding eye contact with anyone near me, I finally felt brave enough to march down the stairs to the baths area. With a hand towel draped casually over one arm, which also conveniently doubled as full frontal coverage, I made my way to the baths.

My confidence was immediately shattered when a group of 12 year old Korean girls, who were splashing around in the ‘Children’s Bath’, stopped what they were doing and started giggling and pointing at me. I made a hasty retreat to the “36 Celsius” bath (they’re were all labeled by temperature) and plunged in. While relaxing (read: hiding) in the bath, I saw the scrubbing ajumas and decided that it had to be done.

At a sauna/spa/jimjilbang, there are ajumas (older Korean women sporting black undergarments) and ajoshis (older Korean men with no undergarments) who work in the female/male parts of the baths. They offer scrubs (a full body exfoliating treatment), massages and other things that I couldn’t understand from the ‘menu’.

And so I walked over hesitantly. One ajuma took my locker-key wristband while another gestured for me to lie flat on my back on the plastic covered massage table. I laid down and fought hard not to burst out laughing. Here I was, laying stark naked on a plastic table, in a bath house with a nearly stark naked woman about to scrub me down with exfoliating gloves. What had I been thinking?

And so the scrub began. Ankles, calves, thighs and… oh my! Then stomach and something akin to a breast exam. Shoulders, arm pits, arms and hands. Repeat all of this on the left side and then change to lying on my side where there was more scrubbing of legs, thighs and oh dear!! and up to the torso. Repeat while lying on my stomach and then again while lying on my right side. Add some washing with soap and a few buckets of water thrown on me to rinse off and it was a done deal.
I'm still not sure what to think about the whole thing - definitely the most invasive experience I've ever had - but when in Rome...

Dr. Fish

2008-02-19T18:50:00.006+08:00

Sunday marked 2 years since first coming to Asia. It seems that I have indeed been here for awhile when things like this are just part of another Saturday night.

Jeff's feet enjoying a fishy nibble.

I first heard about Dr. Fish in China. I believe it was somewhere between Lijiang and Dali that I heard about the phenomenon of sitting in pools where little fish nibbled the dead skin off your body. No thank you very much, I though. I’ll stick to my loofah. At the sauna in North Korea, there was the opportunity to have the little suckers nibble the dead skin off of your feet. But the idea of a nude-sauna was more than enough challenge for one afternoon so I again declined. Finally, a few weeks ago, I got brave (read: all my friends were going) and decided to see what the whole thing was about.

While everyone plunged their feet in…

Jen and Jeff in the Dr. Fish pool. Apparently Jen's feet didn't taste so delicious. I however, spent most of the night like this...

For the 2 hours that we were there, I spent most of the time putting the heel of my right foot just below the surface of the water and yelping every time a fish came up for a nibble. I would gradually work myself up again to put a heel in the pool, wait for a fish to come, yelp, and retract the foot. And so the process continued for the evening. The nibbling fish felt like a cross between pins-and-needles in your legs and a strange tickling sensation. That combined with the fact that I generally have a fear of fish eating me (snorkeling is a whole adventure in and of itself), Dr. Fish and I have agreed to disagree.

The Running of the... Koreans?

2008-02-17T19:49:00.003+08:00

Since coming to Asia, I’ve adapted to life as a functioning illiterate quite well. Phrasebooks, picture dictionaries and a big smile have become a regular part of my interactions with people. If a restaurant has a menu with pictures, it’s like striking gold. If a bank clerk even says ‘Hello’ to me in English, I immediately like them more than the rest.

While Korea certainly has more English in every day life than China did, there are also many more rules regarding formal social behavior here. From bowing to elders to pouring drinks using two hands, I’m constantly watching everyone around me to know just what exactly I should be doing. And so, when attempting to make it on the last train home last night, my fate was completely in the hands of the other passengers.

After stepping off the train at the interchange station, there was a blaring announcement over the loudspeaker. I thought I understood it. I thought it said that the train going to Madeul Station (the station before my stop) was coming. In retrospect, I have no idea what the announcement actually said. However, I sensed urgency in the announcement because it acted like a start gun for the 100 meter Olympic sprint. In something akin to the running of the bulls, everyone who had been on the train went charging down the stairs, dashing along the corridor of the line-change and plunging down another set of stairs to the train platform.

Since I could hear the rumblings of a train on the other line, I immediately followed pursuit.

I’ve also become quite good at running for trains and navigating through large masses of people since living here. I zigged when everyone else zagged and made it down the second staircase in record time. When I reached the train platform, I found a few sheepish looking runners and… no train…

It seemed that the announcement was for the train heading in the opposite direction.

Rules are Rules

2008-02-15T22:05:00.001+08:00

From the Lamphu Guesthouse, Bangkok

Beach Bummin'

2008-02-13T20:27:00.004+08:00

After a day in Bangkok, it was time to move on to Koh Chang. This involved a 6:00am wake-up call, a 20 minute late bus, a 6 hour bus ride, one ferry and a ride in the back of a truck to Koh Chang Lagoon Resort, where, unlike in Bangkok, they still had our reservation. It was set to be the perfect beach holiday.

There was soft white sand, shady palm trees, and calm water. With four days of relaxing on the beach infront of me, I couldn't have been happier. And then I woke up Saturday morning and heard the most dreaded sound anyone on a beach holiday could hear - raindrops on the window.

I pulled the blankets back over my head (the air conditioner was on extra-freezing-mode) and hoped that I was dreaming. Two hours later, I woke up again and everything outside was quiet. I slowly pulled the curtains back, fingers crossed, but found only gray skies.

And that's how it stayed until the day I left to go back to Bangkok. So much for that perfect beach holiday.

Bangkok

2008-02-11T15:42:00.000+08:00

I had been in Bangkok for less than 24 hours, had slept not quite enough but rolled out into the sunshine anyways to go to a one of the most delicious breakfast places I’ve encountered while traveling these past two years. After devouring a tasty mushroom and herb omelet and downing the second-best pineapple shake of the trip (the best pineapple shake would be had the following day), Kelly and I made our way to Wat Phra Kaew for a touristy morning.

While meandering through the park on the way there, I noticed a man in neon-green-short-shorts and unbuttoned flannel shirt carrying a paper lunch bag. That’s an odd combination, I thought. Before this thought process could go any further, the man moved the paper bag from in front of his groin to reveal the contents of his lunch (if you will).

I gasped, averted my eyes and tried to cross the street as quickly as possible.

While shoving a protesting Kelly into oncoming traffic, she managed to ask what was wrong before a motorcycle almost took her out at the knees. Stepping back on to the curb and waiting for traffic to subside, I explained what I had just seen. She turned around, saw the guy (and his lunch) and said he was still looking at us. We immediately plunged into traffic and ran across the street away from any men in odd combinations of clothing.

An Interview Interlude

2008-02-10T11:39:00.000+08:00

Taking a short break from updating about the trip to answer Jen's "interview questions".

The Rules:

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions

The Questions and Answers:

1. What is the best thing about living in Korea?
If I have to pick just one, I’d say the friends I’ve met here.

2. What is the most frustrating thing about living in Korea?
Saving face, the complete lack of vegetarian options at Korean restaurants, how expensive everything is compared to the rest of Asia and how cold it is in the winter. Oh, and how long it takes me to get anywhere from Nowhere-gu… that's more than one though...

3. What do you miss most about home?
Family and Friends. Having an oven to make pizza and chocolate chip cookies. Automatically understanding everything I see/read/hear.

4. What was your favourite part of your trip to Shanghai?
The familiarity of the city. Knowing how to get everywhere, delicious restaurants, where to go to buy things, and being able to communicate with people in Chinese.

5. What are you passionate about?
Chocolate. Also, learning/teaching. Travel.

The Questions for Jen:

1. What was something you found different about China (as compared to Korea)?
2. What was the best moment of your trip to China?
3. If you could eat only three foods (choosing just one would be too difficult!) and one drink for the rest of your life, what would they be?
4. Who taught you how to knit and why?
5. Where will you be five years from now?

The Offer:

I'm no Barbara Walters but I'll ask you questions if you want me to.

Wo ai Shanghai... Most of the time

2008-02-08T21:49:00.001+08:00

Before I left to travel, I made a list of things I wanted to do while in Shanghai. The number one item was to eat at my favourite Chinese restaurant in Pudong - Smart Noshery Makes You Slobber. This place was a staple in my Shanghai dining. It was cheap, the food was always hot and delicious and best of all, there was an English menu (the owner spoke fluent English and French). It wasn't uncommon for me to go there 2 or 3 times a week and order the same 3 or 4 dishes each time. I loved the place.

The plan was to head to Smart Noshery for dinner on Saturday night to celebrate a triumphant return to Shanghai. So hungry that my stomach was eating my backbone, Kelly and I braved rushhour traffic, the Nanpu Bridge, and the worst weather Shanghai has seen in years to travel all the way back to Pudong for dinner.

I knew the rapid pace of change in Shanghai. I knew that what is there one day can be completely gone the next. But I almost cried when I saw the locks on the doors.

The taxi ride to Blue Frog in Superbrand Mall was the most depressing 15 minutes of my life. I couldn't believe that I would never again be able to order mapo dofu - bu yao ro - in the sticky booth with the tables that I always cracked my knees on because they were too small.

Smart Noshery, this ones for you!

On the Road

2008-02-02T12:54:00.000+08:00

As I sat on the flight from Seoul to Shanghai early last Saturday morning, I realized that it had been almost 5 months since I had last been on an airplane - this is the longest period of time in the past 2 years that I've stayed in one place.

Although it's only a short jaunt - Shanghai for 3 days and Thailand for 5 (plus a day of travel on either end) just about everything that could go wrong, has.

The flight to Shanghai was turbulent and upon arriving in Shanghai it seemed that the city was getting the worst end of the global warming stick. It was snowing, sleeting and dipping below freezing in a city that hasn't seen snow for almost 2 years. Then it snowed, rained, hailed and everything in between for the 3 days I was there. Not to mention that the heat in the hostel room didn't work.

Trying to leave Shanghai was a whole other nightmare in itself. Flights were backed up from the past 3 days of poor weather, the airport was filled with stranded travellers and my flight had ceased checking in until further notice. Further notice turned out to be 3 hours later. Add on another 3 hour wait for the flight to depart put me in Bangkok at close to 1:00am Shanghai time. Arriving at K.C Guesthouse in Bangkok, the "friendly" manager informed Kelly and I that they were over booked and consequently didn't have room for us but they had "conveniently" found us another place to stay... at double the price. "Not impressed" didn't even begin to cover it.

Expecting nothing but the worst (and hoping only for the best), I travelled the 6 hours to Ko Chang from Bangkok (which, incidentally, felt like the shortest bus travel after the 36 hour bus nightmare of Vietnam '07). Arriving on Ko Chang, the lush green mountains and warm temperatures immediately put me at ease. The resort was easy to find, it's on the brighter side of decent and the beach is only minutes away from the room. Not to mention the amazing air con and satellite TV! Travel luck finally seems to be on my side.

Gyeongbokgung / Gyeongbok Palace

2008-01-20T18:51:00.001+08:00

Entrance to Gyeongbokgung after closing. The only time it's not swarmed with people.

Inside the palace looking over the moat.

The royal throne.

Inside the palace looking out to the city. One of the things that Seoul definitely has going for it is the preservation of Korean history.

Freezing Cold

2008-01-19T09:29:00.001+08:00

I bought this jacket in Shanghai to go to Tibet. Little did I know that Tibet would be warmer than this winter in Seoul.

It’s been cold here in Seoul this past week. Last week the temperature dipped and dived from +3 Celsius to -5, then it would go hurtling back up to +2 and then the next day a nose dive to -6. Checking the weather network every morning was always a surprise. This week, however, was cold. Damn cold. -14 Celsius cold.

Each morning I contemplated how many layers I could fit under my normal work clothes and avoid looking like the State Puff Marshmallow Man. It usually consisted of long johns, knee socks, wool socks, jeans, long john shirt, turtleneck, wool sweater, Columbia jacket, scarf, hat, and gloves.

But Sara, you say, this is nothing new! You wore all that last year in Shanghai!

Yes, I say, but there’s a difference.

Shanghai continually hovered around zero degrees Celsius. Inside was always the same temperature as out because the school corridors didn’t have windows due to the extreme summer heat.

Seoul, however, gave me hope. There were windows in the corridors and air conditioners / heaters in the classrooms. It’s further north than Shanghai and is consequently colder in the winter so there has to be heating. And indeed, there is heating, in the classrooms. This means that one goes from an overheated, dry, stuffy classroom, to the frigid corridor and into another overheated, dry, stuffy, classroom. I’m not sure which is worse – Shanghai or Seoul.

My breaking point, and decision on this matter, came on Thursday. It was -12 Celsius outside and I was wearing as many clothes as possible. Being the first one in my classroom for the winter camps that I’m teaching, I’m responsible for turning on the heaters. So when I arrive at 8:30am, my classroom is only a few degrees warmer than outside. Usually, it’s retained some of the heat from the previous day.

The corridors, though, are exactly the same temperature as outside. So that means that when the school custodial team decides that it’s a good day to wash all of the floors, and then they leave for a lunch break, the puddles of water on the floor turn to ice. ICE. I literally skated my way to my office after winter camp was over.

Ice inside the building. I almost cried I was so cold. Right then and there I decided I would take the Shanghai damp winter over this.

Masagee

2008-01-16T18:02:00.000+08:00

And here I was worried that I wouldn’t have anything interesting to write about this week. Yoga class never fails!

After being propelled into a full bridge by an instructor who thinks that because I have long limbs, I can do yoga well (my Korean co-teacher translated that one for me last Friday), I wasn’t sure what else to expect from the class. It had been pretty intense so far with a good twenty-minutes spent working on core-strength and I wasn’t sure I could handle much more.

Then, the teacher says the Korean equivalent of, ‘you and the person beside you will be partners, one will lie on the mat face down, the other will be the massager’.

I panicked. Was a small Korean woman going to walk on me?! I may be big by Korean standards but I’m definitely not strong enough to support someone who doesn’t know what their doing. I almost jumped up and left the room.

Fortunately, for me (and unfortunately, later, for my partner) the instructor walked us through all of the “massage” techniques – step on their foot with the arch of your foot, move up and down. Shake their calf muscles with the same foot as their leg, step up and down and slowly bend their leg down. Massage their back by gently applying pressure with the bottom of your hand, then, rub their shoulders.

My partner did a great job, she had obviously done this before. I, however, gave her a massage that must have resembled a massage chair on drugs. I jerked, stepped too lightly then (probably) much too heavily. I rubbed her shoulders but applied too much pressure at some points and not enough at others. All the while, I worried that I was going to break this woman who was half the size of me. The instructor sensed my apprehension and spent most of the massage coaching me through it while massaging the woman's right side.

Poor woman - she probably has an extremely relaxed right side of her body and a tense, knotted, left side.

Should be interesting to see what happens at Friday’s class!

Saturday Night at City Hall

2008-01-14T19:25:00.000+08:00

Ice Sculptures

While they were pretty, they lacked any of the pizazz that Canadian ice sculptures have.

Ice Skating

There were so many people on the rink that people were walking on skates more than they were skating.

More Around Town

2008-01-13T20:29:00.001+08:00

Gwanghwamun 'Gate'

Where the city gate used to stand, there's now replica of sorts.

Close up

Grocery Shopping

2008-01-13T17:09:00.001+08:00

I love going to the grocery store. What I love even more than going to the grocery store is going to the grocery store even more in Asia. Going to the grocery store in China required patience, agility and good loud “ai yaaaaah” (the “yaaah” being more drawn out and whiney than karate chop) to let other buyers know that they had just crashed their cart directly into you. Shopping in Korea in one of the larger hyper-marts requires the same skills but after a year and a half of doing it in China, I prefer the smaller ‘marts’ in my neighborhood.

K-mart is literally around the corner from my building. It has all of the basics and even a few western luxuries (you can buy cheap and fairly tasty camembert). I go there pretty much every other day and the days that I’m not there, I’m certain that Kelly is. In fact, I’ll often be grocery shopping and she’ll come wander down an aisle or I’ll be debating instant rice dishes and she’ll magically appear to suggest a good one.

After meeting in the rice aisle, we usually spend a good 20 minutes wandering up and down every other aisle in the mart. Keep in mind, we come here every other day and the entire store is smaller than any Superstore / Loblaws produce section. It’s not that we can’t find what we’re looking for or are confused by Korean labeling (although buying soy sauce and the fear of getting vinegar is often frightening); rather, every time we go, we always seem to find something new or something ridiculous. Take for example the green grapes in a can (Kelly whipped out her cell phone to photograph these) or the maxi pads that have a central core of herbs to avoid odors (what?!).

While wandering around on Thursday night (it was the second time I had been there that day) and looking for treats to bring to my winter camp students, the produce manager came marching up to Kelly and I, handed us both tangerines, smiled and said something loudly in Korean. We smiled, thanked him and went to check out. Both a little confused by this whole production, we both immediately peeled the tangerines and started munching away so as to show our satisfaction. This was complicated by the fact that I was paying for my groceries and trying to bag them at the same time. Meanwhile, the produce manager was beaming at us from across the store quite pleased with himself.

Just another day at the mart.

Cooking Adventures

2008-01-07T15:21:00.000+08:00

In an attempt to redeem my cooking abilities, I've been hunting down ingredients for curries, soups, and sauces. It's costing me a fortune! This basil cost me $3.74 CAD.

Why is cooking redemtion necessary, you ask?

It all started last year when Kelly and I were roomates. I wouldn't get home until 7:00pm everyday so she would make dinner and I would do the dishes. It worked out great because I was usually starving by the time I got home and she hates doing dishes. We continued this tradition here in Seoul, except I would go over to her apartment for eating and do her dishes there. This worked out fine until about October when she had meetings with teachers or other things to do at school. I quickly made dinner dates with Richard, Jeff and Jen. And so we joked about my inability to cook for myself.

What was once a joke has somehow become fact. While at the grocery store with Richard yesterday, he asked what I was looking for. When I replied, "spices" he was puzzled beyond belief, paused for a moment, and said, "but you don't cook." I promptly punched him in the gut and went on to explain that I do indeed cook, I just haven't cooked lately... for the past year (or more).

And so, tomorrow will be bring another journey out into Seoul in an attempt to find curry paste, coconut milk, and cumin. Dear lord it's hard to find cumin in this city.

Saving Face

2008-01-06T18:05:00.000+08:00

Any travel book you read on Asia will, without a doubt, mention the notion of ‘saving face’. That is, the idea that it’s better to smile through any negative emotion rather than cause someone to be embarrassed or feel uncomfortable. Saving face has been the bane of my existence since coming to this side of the world.

Yesterday, while shopping in Namdaemun Market (one of the giant market of anything and everything here in Seoul) I asked the female store clerk the price of a large bag of candy to use as prizes for my winter camp students. I asked in Korean, the woman responded in Korean and, while taking a minute to compute what she had just told me, she barked “Seven thousand!” in English and turned around to continue re-organizing things in the stall. Looking around some more, both Kelly and I decided that these bags would be the most bang for our buck and went to purchase. Kelly bought hers first. She handed the male cashier a 10 000 won bill and received 2 500 won change. She was rather confused but accepted it and walked away. I, on the other hand, decided to make a fuss. I asked the price before I gave the man my money and when he said ‘chil chun o bak won’ (7 500 won) I took the calculator to disagree while motioning to the other woman and punching in 7 000.

Granted it was a matter of 500 won (a little more than 50 cents) but it was the principal of the whole thing that got me. The man shrugged okay, and started making change. I felt better about things until he handed me 2 500 won. I again pointed to the other woman and said again that she said 7 000 not 7 500. He then takes out 3 000 won in change and the woman jumps in and says “No, no no, 7 500” as if I’m the foreign idiot who couldn’t compute prices. Absolutely frustrated with the whole thing, I say okay, take my change, force a smile and marched out of the store unknowingly knocking my empty coffee cup on the ground and looking like the rudest foreigner around.

In theory, it was the two at the store who were in the wrong. One told me one price, the other told me a higher price, and I should have been given the lower price in that kind of market situation. At least, in theory. Here, however, the notion of saving face seemed to be much more important than what may be right or wrong.

The reason while the difference of 50 cents really gets my goat goes back to last year in China. All during the year, I regularly spent time asking the teachers I was working with in China if what I was doing in the classroom was satisfactory. I asked if they would prefer if I did something different or take another approach to the lessons. With a smile, they all told me that everything I was doing was fine and the students liked me as their foreign teacher. Come time to collect my final pay and “end of year bonus” from the company (the day before I was schedule to fly out of Shanghai), I found out that this wasn’t quite the story – that in fact the schools weren’t so satisfied with my teaching – and consequently, I received a horrible end of year bonus.

Now granted, the teaching portion wasn’t the whole truth of the bonus and it was more that the company was run by some less than savory characters (who knew that I wasn’t re-signing and leaving the next day and could consequently do whatever they like to my pay) but all of that aside, the predominance of ‘saving face’ rather than a sense of right and wrong has soured my opinion of people more than once and left me as one frustrated foreigner in Asia.

Yoga with Korean Characteristics

2008-01-02T19:30:00.000+08:00

Through the years I’ve taken gymnastics classes, dance classes and pilates classes but I’ve never taken a yoga class. I’ve been curious about all the yoga-hype over the past few years and have even perused my mother’s yoga books from the sixties (before I was born my mother was a yoga-doing-vegetarian and my father played the flute barefoot on the roof of their apartment – suddenly a lot of things make sense, eh?).

Flash-forward to January 2, 2008 at 5:00pm. On my left is my Korean co-teacher, on my right is Kelly. We are surrounded by a dozen or so middle-aged Korean women in various types of yoga-garb. One women still has her sunglasses on. Another decided that polyester dress pants are most comfortable for yoga. Before I can take any more in, the class begins.

My Korean co-teacher acts as translator.

“Breath in through nose and…. (loud sighing noise) out through mouth…. And in through nose… (loud sighing) out through mouth… Now, close eyes and…. Roll eye balls in eyes… roll left…. Roll right…. Left…. Right…. Roll eyeballs up… down… up…. Down….”

After 20 minutes of this I thought I was done with yoga class forever but things were, as they say, just starting to get interesting.

The instructions were to roll back from a seated position with knees bent in front towards your right shoulder, roll up and then roll back towards your left shoulder. I was completely incompetent and almost backwards rolled into the small woman behind me. My Korean co-teacher gasped, jumped up and proceeded to rock my body like a small child to show me the motion I was suppose to go in. When I finally became semi-vertical again I looked over to see Kelly completely red faced and splayed on the ground shaking with laughter. We will be, quite obviously, the waegookin comic relief of the class.

After the rolling came the difficult part of the class – foot massaging. For the life of me, I couldn’t manage to place my hands correctly to apply pressure to the ball of my foot while bending at the ankle. I cupped my hands over my foot and went to the left when I should have cupped under and went to the right. Foot massage position after position, my Korean co-teacher would jump up, grab my foot and hands and try to show me the correct way. The yoga instructor sent a few pitying glances in her direction.

The last 10 minutes of the class were spent trying to put my body into impossible positions. I held my leg in front of my body, with my foot in front of my face, with relative ease. When I had to bend my leg behind me and simultaneously lean to the side, I almost took out the small Korean woman behind me again.

The class ended with a rousing slapping of legs, backside and arms in true Asian fashion. Kelly and I walked out thanking my co-teacher for her translations and not knowing if we’re quite willing to head back on Friday.

2008

2008-01-01T11:35:00.001+08:00

Happy New Year!

Tell Me!

2007-12-30T17:37:00.001+08:00

This song is inescapable. It's on constant rotation in the stationary store in the first floor of my building. Spend 10 minutes in any type of clothing store and you will hear it. All of my students have it programmed on their cell phones.

Besides the fact that these girls are incredibly young, the depiction of them as school girls in school uniforms is not too far off. Add another inch of skirt and I could be their English teacher.

Further still, the strange and bizarre "Flasher Scene" in the video is again not entirely that far off. Last Sunday, when Kelly and I were making our way down an escalator into the metro, a man stood at the top, pressed himself against a glass barrier and shouted at us while showing us his manhood.

Merry Christmas! to YOU!

2007-12-24T20:54:00.000+08:00

Even with all of the yule-tide fun that's been happening here (Christmas cookies! Christmas parties! Another Christmas party!), I haven't been feeling very Christmas-y lately. But then this morning, one of my favourite students came running into the office and gave me a letter and a bag of candies. I squealed in thanks and she turned bright red. She wished me a Merry Christmas and ran away.

This is the letter - it made my day.

To Sara

Hello! Ms Sara ~ You'll remember me who makes you annoyed sometimes! From now on, you can call my English name 'Christine.' For reference, I made my name.
However, I never had a experience to send a letter to foreign. So I'm very glad to write a etter for you. Because I think it's a very nice thing that I can speak in English with the whole world person beginning you. The big reason why I study English is I always dreaming to speak in English with everyone perfectly. But I'm not very good at English now. I'll try more! As far as here was just my personal story. The real purpose of writing a letter is ... "Merry Christmas! to YOU!"
I also prepared cadnies for you, have some! I wish it'll be a white Christmas this year! (I'm dreaming of a white Chrsitmas) <-- Just like this song.
I hope that you can spend X-mas with your friends happily and make good memories. My present is simple but eat gusto and you don't need to deel sorry or thanks to me. I just give you as your student who likes you so please thing it comoftably. Take care. and Merry Christmas once more!
P.S Can you understand me even if my setences are incorrect? ^0^
And don't forget to invite me to your home! Ha Ha...
From, Christine

Christmas Tree Explosion

2007-12-23T18:45:00.000+08:00

Christmas tree explosion at Namdaemun Market.

Christmas Light Display

2007-12-20T18:14:00.000+08:00

Part of the 6 storey high Christmas light display along

Cheonggyecheon Stream. It's huge!

Election Day

2007-12-19T08:57:00.000+08:00

Today is election day in Korea and I couldn't be more excited. Finally, all of the election campaign trucks will be silenced.

Lately, I haven’t been sleeping very well. I could blame it on the afternoon coffee or the diet coke that I had at dinner or even leaving my heating system on by accident and the apartment becoming much too hot causing me to drag myself out of bed towards the fridge looking for water like a man in the Sahara for 30 years. But even with all of those things, I could have slept on had it not been for the Korean election trucks.

It all started about 3 weeks ago when I heard pop-music blasting from outside my window. Nothing new, restaurants opening and cars driving by with over-the-top sound systems have been a regular occurrence around here. But, when I looked out my window, much to my surprise, I saw a huge truck with one side completely covered with a flat screen television and a giant megaphone perched on the top.

That’s it. I thought. Get out the Canadian Consulate’s evacuation plan. Kim Jeong-Il has finally invaded.

After listening to the truck for a little while longer and squinting down at the screen that covered the entire side of the truck, I finally saw a date flash up – 12.19 – then in sunk in, the Korean election. It was an election truck trying to gather up votes.

The candidate promotion has continued every day, at all times of day until this very morning. On week days, I awake to blaring pop music as one truck sits across the street. On the weekends, I wake up to what sounds like two televisions at full volume sitting on either side of my apartment playing the Super Bowl half-time show. Thinking that I’m having a horrible dream, I roll out of bed looking for a remote to turn the noise off but instead am faced with election trucks on either side of the street with dancing supporters dressed in matching jackets.

While I give Candidates 1-12 (too many names for the populace to remember, so they use numbers) credit for interesting methods for drumming up support, I thank the powers that be that it’s all over today and I never ever have to listen to those damn trucks again.

That's my building in the background. I'm on the fifth floor yet I can hear every word from the truck as clearly as if I were standing next to it.

*Photo Credits: Kelly took these wonderful photos and I infringed on copyright and stole them after I accidentally deleted my own.

Cookie Adventures

2007-12-16T19:48:00.000+08:00

I love cookies. Period. End of sentence. Baking cookies makes me happier than... I don't even know what. Eating cookies that have just come out of the oven is a meal in itself for me. I love cookies.

In Asia, kitchens do not have ovens. They have two to four burner gas ranges. Only the wealthy have gas ovens.

That said, I'm sure you can imagine just how much I've missed cookies while living on this side of the world. Not to mention that they don't really do cookies here like they do at home.

When Jen and Jeff announced that their apartment came with an oven, I was over-joyed. When we decided that we would have a Christmas cookie swap I was beyond excited. We decided that every person who would come would bring a batch of cookie dough and we would spend the afternoon watching Friends re-runs and baking (and eating!!) cookies.

This morning I woke up at an un-godly hour for a Sunday morning thanks to the election trucks outside my apartment (more on that tomorrow). However, it gave me plenty of time to start baking cookies.

At any given time in Canada, I will have all ingredients handy for a batch of chocolate chip cookies. In Korea, it took trips to four different foreign food stores to find all the ingredients necessary. I paid more than $5.00 for a bag of Hershey mini-chocolate chips and about $7.00 for vanilla extract. But what was more ridiculous than that was the process that I went through to make the cookies.

Two pots acted as my wet and dry ingredient mixing bowls, a tupperware container was my measuring cup and a Korean-style spoon my mixing spoon.

Although it was a bit of a messy process

The end results (and baking cookies for almost five hours) were more than worth the trouble.

The Best Parents in the World

2007-12-03T19:13:00.000+08:00

A few weeks ago my mom e-mailed and asked if there was anything she could send to me for Christmas. My immediate response was, of course, Peanut Butter M&Ms. She told me to think on it and a week later I sent her a list of a few luxury things that I couldn't find here.

Today I received a huge box filled with more winter clothes (after living in Shanghai, I've forgotten what real winters are like), my Christmas stocking, western junk-food and a Christmas tree in a box.

It was the best Monday at 5:00pm ever as I stood building my 2 foot Christmas tree and eating Turtles. I have the best parents in the world.

The Cast of Characters - Continued

2007-11-30T21:08:00.000+08:00

Today I received the following message from Vanessa: WHAT? I'm NOT your friend? FINE!

Well, perhaps it didn't go exactly like that but either way, I wasn't finished with my introductions... so, without further ado...

Vanessa and Becky: A Canadian and an American

Like Jen, Jeff, Kelly and I, Vanessa was another one who arrived early for orientation because of the way flights worked for flying out of Toronto to Korea with Korean Air. She nervously awaited her new roommate, an American named Becky.

Since the day they both sat behind me during an orientation session, they've continually cracked me up at many points along the way. Vanessa mostly due to her ridiculous laugh and Becky just for being Becky. "What? I don't know what's going on?" has been heard from her on more than one occasion.

Brent and Tammy: The Coolest Parents Ever

Brent was there the day I met jolly ole' Dickey and he also helped fill me in on life in Seoul. He and his wonderful wife Tammy continually out-do all of us at any costume parties we've had thanks to their son Cohen. This little guy has melted everyone's hearts and turned us in to big piles of goo-filled-baby-babblers... That is, until he starts to cry. At this point, a prompt hand-back to Mom and Dad is quickly executed.

And finally...

Dan: The Other Brit.

Dan entered the circle of friends as Dickey's best-mate from Uni but has since become one of the family here. I first hung out with Dan on one eventful evening, that began innocently enough with Indian food and ended with me speaking in a terrible British accent. Fortunately for me, Dan hasn't held the accent against me and regularly travels from Incheon to hang out with all of us.

The Cast of Characters

2007-11-29T17:41:00.000+08:00

So who have I been gallivanting around Korea with you ask? Let me introduce the new buddies.

Jen and Jeff Dawseng. The Newly Weds

Jen and Jeff were the first people I spoke to upon arriving in Korea. They had went through the same recruiting company as I had and we commiserated over the absolutely asinine organization of company. While they were whisked away by the Office of Education, Kelly and I were (demanded to be) driven to the (expensive) hotel we had booked. When I met up with the two again, they a little worse for wear (no sleep and too much kimchi for the first 36 hours in Korea) but I knew they'd be awesome. Since then they've been the best newly-weds I've ever met. Right, I forgot that part. They got married 3 weeks before they came to Korea. Those crazy kids!

Richard. The Brit.

I first met Dickey during the orientation week when he was sitting outside with his orientation-week-roommate Eric. He mocked the fact that I was reading the orientation handbook and I questioned him about life in Seoul (he has been here for a year already). Since then he's become the guide to restaurants and watering holes in Seoul with an extensive knowledge of Itaewon. I hold him responsible for many ridiculous evenings - most notably the Norae Bang Episode of October '07. Some day, though, we may get married to complete the 'Friends' quadrangle.

K-dawg

Really, I couldn't explain our friendship any better than she did here - see "The Balling Chronicles"

More on Snow

2007-11-21T19:27:00.000+08:00

So it seems that while it regularly snows in Seoul, Seoul-ites (Seoulians? Seoulers? Se-oul-sa-ram?) are completely unequipped to deal with the snow. On my walk to school yesterday morning, after the first snow, the sidewalks were a skating rink and the roads were a slushy mess. This morning on my way to school, after a fresh fall overnight, I trudged through a good few inches of snow and felt my socks becoming wetter and wetter in my impractical boots. While walking down the side street to the back entrance of my school, I watched as kids from the neighboring elementary school kicked snow up from the sidewalk with such gusto that it came close to hitting me in the face. Finally, when I reached the back driveway of the school, I heard the screeching and spinning of car tire wheels because someone's all-seasons just couldn't cut it.

The short of the long of it: The lack of road salt/sand, plows or snow-tires will prove for some interesting future blogging.

SNOW!

2007-11-20T18:16:00.000+08:00

First, you have to understand that I love snow like a kid loves Kool-aid. And as a kid, I especially loved Kool-Aid but my mom wouldn't buy it for me because it wasn't healthy. This meant I could only drink it at Anna's house. Somehow Anna was the lithe blond and I was the chubby brunette but her Mom bought the kool-aid. Go figure.

So snow.

Last night, I couldn't sleep. It may have had something to do with the fact that I went to bed 8:00pm. Around 9:40 I got up and wondered if what I was hearing outside was rain. I pushed back the drapes and then saw the snow! I haven't seen snow snowing since before I left Canada for Shanghai almost 2 years ago. I sat with my nose pressed against the window watching the snow until I lost feeling in my nose (my window is single pane glass.)

It was great!

You know it's cold when...

2007-11-19T17:09:00.000+08:00

...you can see your breath INSIDE the school.

After teaching in Shanghai for two winters, I've grown accustomed to the schools not having indoor heating. In the coldest months, Shanghai hovered around 0C. No classrooms were heated, the halls were uncovered and my students and I played a game called "Guess how many layers of clothes Sara is wearing today." It was usually around 5 including a jacket.

Since Korea is so much further north than Shanghai, I figured the schools would have to be heated. In fact, I distinctly remember teachers telling me that the schools are heated. Those teachers and I are no longer on speaking terms.

Today, it was -7C when I left my house. I shivered all the way to school. When I finally arrived at school, I ran to the office expecting the teachers to have finally turned on the heat (the downstairs office has had heat for the past 2 weeks). There was no heat. I sat at my desk and waited. Still no heat. Maybe they just hadn't turned it on yet, it was only 8:15am. 9:22am rolled around and still no heat. Finally, 5 minutes before I was about to leave to teach my first class of the day, a blast of cold air shot at me. They had finally turned on the heat and I was leaving to go to an unheated classroom. Life is so unfair.

Around Town

2007-11-15T19:10:00.000+08:00

My morning started with a trip to Yeouido - an island ('Do' is island in Korean) in the middle of the Han River (the Han River divides Seoul) - to see 63 Building. 60 floors above ground, 3 below.

Then, while killing time before meeting friends for dinner, I went to Deoksugung Palace. For $1.00. It was a good Seoul-day.

KSATs

2007-11-14T22:18:00.000+08:00

Tomorrow is the day for the Korean S.A.Ts. School is cancelled for all students above elementary school, while the 3rd graders (equivalent to 9th graders) write placement tests for high schools and the high schoolers are tested for entrance to universities

It's a big day in Korea. They close down Korean airspace during certain hours. Parents go to temples and grave sites to pray to the deceased to help their children succeed.

This foreign teacher, however, is just enjoying not having to teach.

In Flanders Fields, where Pepero grows…

2007-11-12T19:08:00.000+08:00

Throughout the western world, November 11 is solemn day to commemorate the sacrifices of members of the armed forces and of civilians in times of war. Koreans, however, have a different take on November 11.

In Korea, November 11 is a day to exchange stick biscuits with your friends and loved ones. Something akin to a Valentine’s Day, students exchange the stick biscuits – called Pepero (meaning ‘skinny’) - with their friends and classmates while older Koreans buy extravagant packages of biscuits to impress their lovers.

When I tried to explain what November 11 was in Canada to the teachers at my school, they looked mildly confused and couldn’t understand why I found the difference in meaning of the day so absurd. No teacher could tell me the origin of Pepero Day but Kelly came up with a good theory.

After some solemn remembering yesterday morning, I made my way to the nearest convenience store and celebrated Pepero Day in true Korean style.

When in Rome…

Korean Hospitality

2007-11-10T09:11:00.001+08:00

This past week was bad. Monday left me throwing up my hands, almost in tears, telling a co-teacher "I just don't know what to do with this class. I just don't know." She smiled sympathetically but offered little advice or help. Wednesday, I sat at my desk and stared at my computer screen having no energy to do anything and then went to lunch to find out that one of the Korean teachers is going to Canada over the winter holiday. I almost burst in to tears right then and there. Thursday and Friday left me just plain disgruntled with the school, the staff and Korea.

Amongst all of this, there was one thing that kept me going.

About a week ago I had mentioned to one of my Korean co-teachers that I liked the drink that was in the cafeteria. It was like a sweet spicy cider but I couldn't quite put my finger on the taste. She explained to me that it was 'Sujeongkwa' a persiminnon juice that had cinnamon and ginger. I asked if she had a recipe and she said that she could give it to me. I didn't think any more of it after that.

Then, this past Tuesday afternoon, around 4:00pm, the same co-teacher came in to my office with a grocery bag full on groceries and a piece of paper. She pulled out the recipe and started explaining each part while pulling out the matching ingredient. Not only had she bought me all of the ingredients for the 'Sujeongkwa', she had also made a container full of the juice. I was floored.

I had been told about Korean generosity and hospitality before I came to Korea but this was incredible. This teacher has two small children, a husband and a full and busy life but she had gone completely out of her way (cinnamon sticks, as she pointed out, are very hard to find) and did all this for me after I mentioned in passing that I like the juice. Although things may not always be easy here, I can say without a doubt that the teachers and the school have made me feel more welcome and more part of the school than any school I've ever worked in.

North Korea - Part 3

2007-11-09T20:13:00.001+08:00

Everyone headed to bed early Saturday night after a less than stellar night's sleep on Friday. We woke up early for the hotel breakfast (I still can't get used to eating kimchi for breakfast no matter how hard I try) and were on the buses before 8:00am.

The morning was filled with a "hike" (a slow meander) around Samilpo Lake and some photos of large rocks which had engravings saluting the Dear Leader. The afternoon, however, was when things got interesting.

We (the group of friends I was travelling with) were told by two other friends, who had gone to North Korea last year, that the spa at Kumgangsan was one of the best they had been to in Korea. I was extra excited to give it a try.

Now, for those of you (like me) new to this whole "Korea" thing - spas and saunas are HUGE in Korea. There are Jimjibangs (saunas/bathhouses) in every neighborhood and the whole family goes on a regular basis. The sauna is divided male and female and there are different types of bathing pools (hot pool, jade pool, cold pool) and different saunas (mud sauna, warm sauna, and so on). There are also rooms where you can play cards, have snacks and take a nap if you so desire.

Now there was one deal breaker in all of this that left us Westerners giggling like school girls - the saunas are divided by sex because you go completely stark naked.

Right.

So there we were, heads tucked in our lockers while undressing, giggling and turning red on Sunday afternoon. Finally, Kelly made the first step, locked her locker and marched towards the baths, Jen followed, then Vanessa and Laina and finally, I followed. The once champion of the jimjibang, I was beet red and walking in such a fashion to try to cover myself with my arms that I probably drew even more attention to myself.

After a quick shower, we all jumped in to the pool in the center of the room. One wall was all glass windows and looked out to the pools that were outside with mountains peeking through in the background. It was hard to believe that we were indeed in North Korea.

After an hour of switching pools and saunas, we had all mastered our jimjibang fears. We toweled off, discovered a counter with combs, tissue, and lotion and then hung around applying lotion like it was an every day occurrence to be stark naked with your friends.

It was an interesting end to what had been a very interesting trip.

North Korea - Part 2

2007-11-08T18:03:00.000+08:00

Since crossing the North Korean border took longer than expected, our course for the mountain had to be altered so we were able to get to the acrobatics show on time. Our intended path for the mountain, was a well paced, medium incline, trek. The course we switched to was straight up the mountain on rock and metal stairs (sound familiar?). The course took less than 3 hours up and back leaving more than enough time to make the show.

The Kumgangsan Culture Hall, which houses the Pyeongyang Moranbong Circus, looks like a modern permanent circus tent. Upon entering the Hall, however, you soon get the feeling that time has stopped. The wooden stage was covered with two thin looking gym mats and the trapezes (is that even a word?) that hung from the ceiling looked like they might fall down at any minute. The acrobats were also accompanied by a live band perched to the right of the stage and the background was created by projections of nature scenes.

The show began with a parade of the performers and the MC (a female in a large fuschia hanbok) telling us to applaud very loudly for the performers so they know we are enjoying the performance. The women were clad in garish bodysuits with sequins everywhere and the man were in strange green pirate pants with funny red boots.

For the entire performance I was on the edge of my seat. This was due not only to the acrobatic feats but also to the fact that the equipment looked like it had come second-hand from Russia. The safety harnesses looked like nothing more than a glorified telephone cords and the safety net for the final act looked as if it had been pulled from some fisherman's shack a few hours earlier. I had sweaty palms for the whole show and prayed for every performers safety. Despite these 'minor' technicalities, the performance was quite enjoyable.

My favorite act came towards the middle of the show with a single male acrobat and two long sheets of white material drapped from the ceiling. I had seen acts similar to this in other shows where the performer wraps himself in cloth to suspend himself and then orbits around the stage. This acrobat did just that but then finished the act by 'climbing' (looping the cloth around his arms) to the top of the rope/cloth and then 'falling' (controlled by the cloth unwinding) back to the stage. It all sounds quite ridiculous in written form but on stage it was quite spectacular.

North Korea - Part 1

2007-11-07T18:45:00.000+08:00

North Korea as seen from the Dora Observatory on the DMZ tour.

The trip to the DMZ made a great preview for my trip to North Korea this past weekend. While the “security precautions” at the Dora Observatory in the DMZ were ridiculous (you weren’t allowed to take pictures of the North unless you were standing behind the yellow line on the ground that was a good three meters from the binoculars which were set up to get a closer glimpse of North Korea), they held true in North Korea. Photos were rarely allowed unless you were on Kumgang Mountain or in the tourist square where the hotel was situated at the base of the mountain.

But that’s getting ahead of things.

I left for North Korea last Friday night at 12:30am, we drove all night – I took a lot of motion sickness meds and was out for the entire ride – and arrived at the South Korean border around 7:00am after a brief rest stop just south of the border. The South Korean border crossing was an extremely modern building, where our passports were stamped and luggage was scanned in a matter of minutes. We then boarded new buses to take us to the North Korean border. The North Korean border crossing essentially a glorified wedding tent where we waited in huge lines and had to proceed through by the numbers on our huge ID cards that were required to be visible at all times.

The guy in front of me in line was Korean-American (American-Korean?) and our tour guide came running up to him minutes before he had to pass through North Korean immigration and told him under no circumstances should he speak Korean to the immigration officer. Sure enough, the officer took one look at the guy and started speaking to him in Korea. The guy shook his head and said “I don’t understand.” The guard looked disgruntled and handed the guy back his American passport.

We re-boarded our new “North Korean” tour bus and waited for another half hour for the rest of the people at immigration to board their buses. All buses passing through have to move together and there was at least a dozen at our permitted border crossing time. (Unfortunately, due to photo restrictions, I have no documentation of any of this.)

As we headed to the “tourist square” at the base of Kumgang Mountainit was hard to miss the North Korean soldiers standing every hundred meters with red-flags in hand. They watched the buses as they past just waiting for one of us to do something 'illegal' (i.e. take a picture from the bus). We reached the the 'safety' of the tourist square for a brief rest stop and then started the journey to the mountain.

On route to the mountain, we stopped for a group photo (there was about 90 foreigners on the tour I was on) at the huge picture of the Dear Leader and the Great Leader. Before we got off the bus, people were sticking their cameras out of the bus to take photos of the picture (when I got closer I saw that it was a huge tiled mosaic). I handed my camera over to Kelly in the window seat and she began snapping away. When we got off the bus, people immediately started whipping out their cameras for a closer shot. The North Korean tour guide and our South Korean guides started freaking out and yelling at us to stop. That we were not at all permitted to take photos of the mosaic and if we wanted one we could come back tomorrow and maybe the bell hop at the hotel across from the mosaic would take a picture of it for us.

And this was less than 3 hours in to the trip.

DMZ Tour

2007-11-06T17:51:00.000+08:00

Hanging out with the North Korean Soldier in a "modified taekwondo position". I was terrified. Not that you can tell or anything.

While going to bed at 4:45am usually means it was a pretty interesting evening. Waking up at 4:45am is never my idea of a good time. But this is what I did a few weeks ago in order to trek to the Demilitarized Zone between North and South Korea. The tour was with the USO and we had to report at the office (over an hour subway ride from my apartment) before 7:00am. After boarding the bus, I promptly fell asleep.

By 9:00am we had passed through the gates on the South Korean side of the DMZ and were instructed that no photos were permitted until further notice. We reached Ballinger Hall for a briefing before we were allowed to continue the tour to the Joint Security Area (JSA). During the briefing we had to sign away the right to blame anyone if the North Korean’s got us and were made aware that the North Korean’s wore “drab beige uniforms”, while the South Koreans were recognizable by their olive green uniforms. Obviously North Korea was not at Military Fashion week.

After the briefing we again boarded the buses and made for Panmunjeom in the JSA where North Korean and South Korean forces stand face to face every day. It was pretty intense to say the least. The South Korean soldiers stand with half of their body shielded by the building so that if the North Koreans shoot their heart will be covered from flying bullets.

The military demarcation line (MDL) runs directly through the middle of the conference room and tables where the North Koreans and the United Nations Command (primarily South Koreans and Americans) meet.

On the North Korean side of the conference room, you’re able to see the wear of the paint on the walls. A number of years ago, while a South Korean soldier was locking the ‘door to North Korea’ a North Korean solider attempted to pull the South Korean soldier in to the North. After escaping, it’s protocol for the locking of the door to be a two man operation. Now one soldier braces the other soldier while locking the door.

Some of the precautions and actions seemed ridiculous and our US military tour guide had a great sense of humor while telling us the history of the JSA. He told us how the South Koreans placed a huge South Korean flag close to the MDL for the North Koreans to see after they boycotted the Olympics in Seoul. The North Koreans responded by building an even bigger flag pole to shadow the South Koreans. It is now the (or one of the) largest flag pole(s) in the world and it takes an extremely windy day to make the 300lb North Korean flag fly.

So remember that time someone locked you in the office?

2007-10-24T19:14:00.000+08:00

The teacher's office where I sit is a converted classroom. This means that the doors are sliding doors and there's a latch on the outside that closes with a padlock. Usually, there's always at least one teacher inside the office so no one ever bothers to lock the door.

Today, I was the last one in the room when the other teacher's went out for lunch. I heard them close the door (I was working on lesson plans at my computer) and then heard noise that sounded like a padlock being locked. I assumed the kids in the hall were just playing with the door and the lock - it wouldn't be the first time. I went on working for the next 45 minutes until I was absolutely starving at 12:30.

I got up to go to lunch only to find out that the door wouldn't slide open. One of the teacher's had locked me in the office.

I had no idea of any of the other English teacher's extensions in their offices nor any of them answer their cell phones when I tried to call. I tried to bang on the door in the hopes that a student would come and understand what was going on but no one heard anything through the noise of lunch being served to the students in their classrooms.

Eventually a student did come along at about 12:45 and between the small crack of the window that was not covered by posters, I waved frantically. They looked confused that someone was in there and the door was padlocked shut.

"Teacher! Unlock! Door" I said to the poor kid who was on the other side. The kid stood there still stunned that there was someone in the office. "Get a teacher! Door!" The kid rattled the lock to indicate it was, indeed, locked. "Yes! Go to a teacher. Key. Door!" I said again. Eventually, he left (probably wondering about the state of my English and just how I was the English teacher). I knew I was as good as missing lunch.

Finally at 12:50 one of the teacher's came back from lunch.

"Hooray!" I shouted as he opened the door. He looked surprised at the fact that I was in a room with the door locked. I didn't give him much time to compose a sentence (he's a Korean math teacher) and ran to catch the end of a not so pleasant lunch.

Beer School

2007-10-22T19:12:00.001+08:00

This little place is across the street from my school.

School

2007-10-22T18:54:00.000+08:00

Today, as I was almost knocked over by a heard of middle school boys charging down the hall, I realized that at one time I would not have considered this to be a normal 'school' behavior. Things that once seemed so foreign have now become part of my daily routine.

On a regular basis I will see:
1. Students running at full speed in the hall.
2. Students wrestling to the point of physical injury in my classroom before class starts.
3. Students with expensive cell phones texting each other while I'm teaching.
4. Students completely asleep in my class and having no problem going back to sleep once I've reprimanded them.
5. Students talking at full volume while I'm teaching.
6.Teachers tugging on students' ears as a form of punishment.
7. Boys poking each other in (up) the bum.*
8. Students bowing to me in the hall.

Canadian schools are going to seem so foreign when I come home. It will either be a pleasent surprise or I'm going to be fired because I made a student stand and face a wall with his arms above his head in order to punish him.

*No joke. Kelly broke up a fist fight on her first day of school because of this.

Everyone needs a good laugh now and then...

2007-10-21T20:17:00.000+08:00

For Jessica, who started the box jokes, and for Krista and Robert, who still break out the bush jokes, and for everyone else who has always wanted to catch it on film...

The Mystery Dish

2007-10-18T20:16:00.000+08:00

I first saw the dish in my hall on Monday morning. It was on the floor next to the apartment a few doors down. I assumed someone had ordered take-out to their apartment and left the dish outside to be picked up. This is a common phenomenon in Korean take out. A restaurant, usually one in your building, will deliver food to your door on non-disposable dishes and then come a few hours later to pick it up. It's basically apartment complex room service.

On Tuesday morning, the dish had moved back to my side of the hall and beside the apartment next door. I was confused why it was still there and wondered if someone had left a friend a gift that they hadn't notice.

When I came home Tuesday afternoon, the dish was closer to my door than it had been in the morning. How sweet, I though! Someone had finally realized that there was a waegook (foreigner) living in the building and had dropped off a 'Welcome to the Office-Tel' gift. When I looked at it more closely, I realized that it was basically left-overs in a large metal bow wrapped in a plastic bag. Hmm...

Wednesday morning, I opened my door to go to school and practically tripped over the thing. I kicked it aside and pushed it further to my other neighbour's door in the hopes that they would do something with it. Wednesday night I came home and it was in front of my door again.

This morning, it was back to resting between my door and my neighbour's door. I figured that the toddlers who run screaming up and down the hall at 11:00pm each night had crashed in to it and moved it the few inches. I hoped that it would be gone by the time I got home in the evening.

When I came home this evening, it was... surprise, surprise, still there. It's got a few more days of enjoying the hall until I go door to door to find it's owner... or move it to the other end of the hall...

Norae Bang!

2007-10-15T18:53:00.000+08:00

Our little group minus photographer Jen.

L-R Me, Seamus the random Irish Guy, Kelly, Richard, Jeff, Dan

I sang karaoke for the first time last year in China and have been addicted ever since. Unlike Western karaoke, you rent a small room, bring or order food and drinks, and sing your heart out for as long as you care to pay for the room. In China, it's called KTV (Karaoke Television). Hoping over one country, you have the Korean Norae Bang ("bong" not bahng). This literally translates as 'Singing Room' (Norae - singing, Bang - room).

Flash forward to last Sunday when the group of us met at Nashville's around 2:00pm and then somehow (must have been the cola) ended up at a Norae Bang hours later. This was my first Norae Bang experience in Korea and has to date (I went again last Saturday) been the best. The the selection of English songs put Chinese KTV to shame, and since we were a group of Westerners, we didn't have to wait while 8 Chinese people sang 8 Chinese songs that none of us knew or could even attempt to sing.

We spent a solid hour singing our hearts out to numerous Spice Girls songs, something that I think was an attempt at Metallica and then finished the evening with a raucous rendition of Bon Jovi's "Livin' on a Prayer". It was the best Sunday since arriving in Korea.

From Canada!

2007-10-06T02:28:00.001+08:00

Found in Apkujong ("Rodeo Drive"-like shopping area) during Chuseok (Korean Thanksgiving).

And the Adventures Continue

2007-10-04T19:51:00.001+08:00

During my first week at the school, one of the Korean teacher’s introduced herself. She’s a Korean language teacher but has been going to Canada every year for the past three or four years to do a home-stay during the summer. Her English is amazing considering that she’s only been studying English for the past four years and is forty-something.

While I was showing her pictures from the East Coast (she usually does home stay in Edmonton), she was asking me what I like to do in my free time. Since I was still on a post-summer-travel-rush, I immediately said I like to travel and hike. This, for many reasons, was a bad idea. She told me that a group of teachers were planning a trip to Seorak Mountain on the eastern side of Korea and that I should join the group. Because it was my first week at school, I agreed to the idea and said I would be excited to go.

Cue me, Wednesday morning at 2:00am beginning the most intense hike I’ve done to date. Yes, 2:00am. We had to see the sunrise.

The trail began with about an hour of direct incline on what can only be called a stone staircase. It was obviously man-made but wasn’t a perfect structure. The stones were often at awkward angels and the path was narrow. This wouldn’t have been so bad if there was two full bus loads of Koreans joining my group of Korean teachers on this early morning hike.

Korean hikers are nothing like Chinese who take on mountains. Every single Korean I saw (and one 10 year old boy) was dressed like they were scaling Everest. Fancy nylon hiking pants, shirts and vests, hiking sticks, packs with bear bells, tin cups and spare carabiners attached, not to mention the foam sit-upons. Further to their gear, these men and women meant business on their hike. I was pushed out of the way by their walking sticks (often they had two!) more times than I could count. This would have been less frustrating if it was light out.

Thanks to my friend Jeff, I was equipped with a nice head-lamp and have never been so thankful to have a head-lamp. As I made my way up the mountain, I couldn’t decide if the trek would be more or less scary if it had not been light. In the dark, I couldn’t see past the light that my lamp cast. Had I been able to, I would have been more aware of the sheer drop to my right or just how slipper the boulders were that I was climbing by rope. By the time we reached the peak (1780 metres), I was exhausted and cold. Since it had been misting for the past hour, there was no sunrise to see. In fact, you could barely see more than five metres down the mountain. We cooked a 'delicious' morning breakfast of kimichi and ramen noodles before spending five hours making our way back down the mountain.

Except “back down” was more of a “back up” and then “a little down” followed by more "back up” and “up” and “up” before it became “back down at a thirty-degree angle". The ‘enjoyment’ of all of this was heightened by the only English speaking Korean teacher (the one who roped me into it in the first place) constantly warning me about how steep the hill was and how I should “go slow” and “be careful” and “take it easy” and make sure I didn’t step on the rocks that were at an angle or put my toe down first. Always always always, heel first. Helpful hints the first time but by hour four, in the rain, with burning calf muscles, all I could utter was an “MmmHMM!” in response.

Twelve hours after we started, we reached the base of the mountain and I have never been so happy in all my life. I still can’t walk up stairs today, but at least I’m not at the top of a mountain.

Going down down down. There was a staircase because it was so steep at this point.

A Trek Through the Bulyeong Valley

2007-10-02T16:43:00.000+08:00

There’s an English travel group in Seoul that does different trips each weekend. This past weekend was a trip to a Pine Mushroom Festival in Uljin (supposedly Pine Mushrooms grown in Uljin are a “diamond of the forest”) and a trek through the Bulyeong Valley.

The organizers described the trek portion of the trip on the website like this:

We will trek down a valley along a creek with many trees and plants in of the few truly natural and untouched areas in Korea. The trail will be broken in some parts, and we may have to walk through the creek, so be prepared to get wet.

The day started out at 6:00am in order to have breakfast at 7:00am so that we could be on the bus at 8:00am. After an hour drive (nap) we all clambered off the bus and headed down the cement steps to the river valley. Alright, I thought, cement steps, this can’t be that bad. Much like my hiking in China, paths are never as they first appear.

The trail was not “broken in some parts” it was broken in ALL parts. We were immediately faced with the decision to cross the river in knee-deep water or scramble over slippery rock face. I chose the river.

The hike progressed at a snail’s pace (4km in over 4 hours). When we could stay on the “trail”, it was slow going with awkward footing. There were a few more streams that were crossed – I eventually gave up switching from hikers to flip-flops and plunged in with my hikers on. It was when we were climbing a rock face and I heard Jen mutter “Oh shit” that I knew things were only just getting interesting. When I reached the top, I saw a row of people in chest deep water with packs on their head.

Kelly crossed first and instructed us on the best route. Mostly it was about not getting carried away by the current as you cornered a huge boulder. Jen went in second and her five foot and not much more frame was almost completely submersed by water. We all feared for our digital cameras and iPods in our packs. Jen got stuck in the current coming around the boulder and couldn’t move because of the force of the water. When she was finally able to get fully around, we started passing bags along from one side to the other so people had hands free to cross. We emerged triumphant and soaking wet a good ten minutes later to face the next two hours of rock scrambling and more river crossing in the rain.

My hikers are still drying in my apartment. I’m hoping they’ll be ready for me to conquer Mount Seorak tomorrow.*

*I tried to post this at work on Monday but blogger seems to be blocked. It's now Tuesday evening, a few hours before I head to Seoraksan, and my hikers are dry!

Krazy Korea!

2007-09-27T09:36:00.001+08:00

Kelly and the push-up-padded-posterior-panties

The "Ade" on the menu of TGI Friday's

Old Timey Scuba Gear on the Street in Itaewon

My My Metro Card

2007-09-26T21:51:00.000+08:00

Yet another Seoul-adjustment that I've had to consciously make is lining up for the metro. No longer do I plunge head-down, elbows-up, in to a crush of people all trying to make their way on to a speeding, underground, capsule. Instead, I line up, let the people on the train get off the train and then proceed to get on the train. What is even more incredible than this is the fact that I'm able to find a seat 80% of the time. I think I sat down on the train in Shanghai maybe 5 times out of the whole time I lived there.

These niceties, I've found out, seem to go out the window at 5:00pm on a Monday. It was one such Monday about two weeks ago when Kelly and I were running for the train that just arrived in the station when disaster struck. A man in a proper business suit was much too eager to catch the train and rammed into Kelly from behind at full-speed. This caused her to lose her balance and tumble on top of me in an attempt to regain her balance. All the while accidentally stepping on my flip-flop from behind.

The next thing I knew, I was on the train, Kelly was on the train and the business man was on the train but my flip-flop was not. I ran back outside on to the platform to grab my shoe and looked up just in time to watch the doors close in my face. Kelly and I frantically mimed a "Get off at the next station and I'll meet you there!" conversation in the window while the entire car of the train was in hysterics over the whole situation.

So much for niceties.

Wait. I've been here for a month already?

2007-09-26T07:43:00.001+08:00

Without a doubt, my perspectives on Seoul have been colored by my experience in Shanghai. The first thing that was striking was just how low this city is. After the massive sky-scrappers of Shanghai, I was expecting the same here. Rather than massively tall buildings, the Koreans seem to shove every conceivable kind of business into a twelve or thirteen story building.

The buildings are usually constructed something like this:
Floor 1 – Galbi and/or Samgyeopsal Restaurants. A GS 25, Family Mart or Buy the Way (convenience stores with beer). Hair dresser and, in my neck of the woods (literally, I’m so far north, one of the exit’s for the metro points the way to the Mountain I see from my window), Outdoor Wear.
Floor 2 – Minus the convenience stores and outdoor wear, more of the same of Floor 1 and usually a bar of some sort.
Floor 4 – Offices
Floor 5 – PC Bang (Korean "Computer Room" a.k.a Seedy Internet Cafe). This may also be located in the basement.
Floor 6 – Hogwan (Korean private academy). Usually for English.
Floor 7 – Something in Korean that I can’t read
Floor 8 – Another English Hogwan
Floor 9 – Norae Bang (Korean “Singing Room” a.k.a. Karaoke)
Floor 10 – Something else in Korean I can’t read
Floors 11 – 13: Don’t have signs. I’m assuming Office-Tels.

Office-Tels are the Korean solution to “working from home”. They’re designed so people are able to live and work in the same space. My office-tel consists of an entry way with a “galley-kitchen” on one side (sink, fridge and a 2 burner gas range) and large closet, pantry and bathroom on the other. Pass that and you enter one large room with my bed, kitchen table and oversized orange chair. Not to mention the wall of cupboards I have just below my ceiling to mid-wall windows.

I’m still waiting for this place (and the rest of Seoul) to start to feel like home.

The First Day in Nowon-Gu

2007-09-01T08:08:00.000+08:00

As I write this, I'm at my new school sitting in the most posh chair I've ever sat in. As I lean back, the two back panels fold inward, creating firm back support while simultaneously massaging my lower lumbar. I will be sad to leave this chair next July.

Yesterday, after the final farewell dinner at the orientation site, I boarded a bus bound for Nowon-gu (or, as I prefer, Nowhere-gu - gu means district) located as far North-East in Seoul as you can get. That is, I might end up in the DMZ by mistake someday.

There were about 18 teachers on my bus that were headed to Nowon-gu and neighboring Dobong-gu (originally, the same gu but then they divided in to two a few years ago). There was a central meeting spot where our co-teachers would come, pick us up, and then take us to our schools and apartments. On my bus, there was another teacher (Korean-American) named Sarah Yun. I'm sure you can imagine where this story is going.

When we arrived at the bus stop, I heard them calling for a 'Sara(h)' but when the other Sarah answered the call, I assumed she had double checked and made sure she was being picked up by the right teacher. So I waited. Said goodbye to Kelly when she was picked up by her teacher. Ad waited. And finally the chief-teacher in charge asked me what my name was and what school I was going to and realized the mistake. We all laughed over the similarities and my co-teacher came back to collect me and take me to my new office-tel (studio apartment).

After being showed around my apartment - this included a detailed explanation of how every light switch worked. Two of my new co-teachers took me out for galbi for dinner. (Let's just say, that I'm going back to the same restaurant again tonight.) After dinner, I was walking back down the street with the younger of the two co-teachers, the other having taken her daughter home, when I look up and see another wai-gook (foreigner) walking down the street - it was Kelly! We found out that we actually live right across the street from each other. With this good news, we headed back to our apartments, my co-teacher heading to the subway, and did respective showings of our new homes.

A Change in Tastes

2007-08-28T20:51:00.001+08:00

I brought my camera to lunch today to document the difficulties of being a vegetarian in Korea. However, today was the first decently veggie lunch that I've had since being here.

Tonight, to escape the horrors of cafeteria kimchi I went out for dinner with a group of people, samgyeopsal was ordered and then this happened...

As Kelly said, it's a good thing I'm not Jewish.

2007-08-25T17:11:00.000+08:00

I’ve been having a lot of trouble composing this first post about being in Korea. I thought I would write about just how confusing Toronto Pearson Airport is and how you have to take a train from Terminal 1 to Terminal 3. Then I thought I would write about how my bags came off the luggage claim belt in Incheon Airport and were tagged as not properly clearing customs. Consequently, they needed further inspection – the culprit being a flashlight that appeared as a strange piece of metal in the middle of my pack (Was it a gun?! A bomb?!). That seemed to be the highlight of the flight until I was met at the arrivals gate by people from the program I’ll be working for after already having made (expensive) hotel reservations as instructed by the recruiter. But, then there was the strange airport hotel and the 2 hour drive from the hotel to the orientation site today that left me completely wiped and ready for a nap when I’ve been sleeping for 10 hours since I arrived in Korea. It's been a long couple of days.

My Bags Are Packed

2007-08-21T04:45:00.000+08:00

My bags are finally (!) packed and in less than 24 hours I'll be making my way to Toronto to catch my flight to Seoul. There was a minor debacle this morning when I weighed my suitcase only to find out that it was 100lbs. After popping some Advil and devouring a chocolate bar, I unpacked the entire suitcase, slimmed down the amount of shoes I was taking from 7 pairs to 3 (2 pairs of which are already boxed and ready to be shipped once I find out my address). With the shoe weight decreased, I spent a good hour walking around the house debating what could be left behind, what could be shipped and what I had to take with me. The result: A 70lbs duffle bag, a 50lbs pack and two carry-ons when I'm technically only allowed one. Fingers are firmly crossed for kind ladies working the Korean Air check-in counter.

Four Days

2007-08-18T10:20:00.001+08:00

I woke up in the middle of the night last night and had absolutely no idea where I was (this has been happening off and on for the past three weeks). It's a panicky few minutes where I run through a list of possible places I could be: Shanghai, no, South-East Asia, no, Montreal, no, Home, yes, okay. Then I fall back to sleep. Unfortunately, I'm sure I have a few more of these night-time panic-attacks to look forward to in the upcoming weeks.

On Being Home

2007-08-11T08:42:00.000+08:00

Of all the western luxuries to look forward to at home, easy access to peanut butter M&Ms have been at the top of the list.

I first discovered these most delicious treats when I was flying home last summer from Shanghai and Kelly bought a bag in the Toronto airport. We devoured the whole bag in the first half hour of the 2 hour flight. It's been a serious addiction ever since. After the first terrible week of school in September, my parents had a bag in the mail with a card. Then, some for Christmas, my birthday, a middle-of-March present (well, that is, I demanded that they send me a bag and they politely agreed for fear of me not coming home in the summer), and then a surprise late-April package. Not to mention the bag that Kyle's parents sent to me in his care package... um... right.

So tonight, after I finally found them at the pharmacy by my house (grocery stores don't seem to stock them), I wasn't being polite about stocking up. I picked up 2 of the large "convenience" size packages to take back to Seoul with me and then went on a hunt for a small bag for evening snacking. When I couldn't find any, I went back for two more large size bags.

When I arrived at the check-out, the guy behind the counter looked at me for a few minutes before he was able to ask if I had the pharmacy's discount card. I told him no, I didn't have the card, and then added a huge smile as an attempt to show that there was obviously a very sane reason for buying four HUGE bags of M&Ms and haha! Isn't it funny?! The check-out guy rang in my total, bagged my items and then focused his attention on the blond college-aged-girls standing behind me who were buying mix for drinks. I collected my bags and ran out to the car, figuring it was better to wait until I was alone to rip open one of the four bags.

Just another night back home.

It's Been Awhile

2007-08-06T10:43:00.000+08:00

After a year away, I've returned home. I'm only here for 17 days before I take off again on the next teaching adventure in Seoul.

A lot has happened since the last post but for now a few pictures.

Tiger Leaping Gorge

3 Pagodas - Dali

Golden Stupa, Laos

Angkor Wat

(Even though the quality is poor, this is one of my favorite photos from Angkor Wat. This picture was taken just before I was attacked by the plastic raincoat hawkers.)

Halong Bay

Hanoi to Guilin

2007-07-29T16:24:00.000+08:00

The trek from Hanoi to Guilin ties with the trek from Nha Trang to Hanoi for longest travel days during this trip. The day started with less than 5 hours sleep and wandering back to my hotel around 5:00am to find the door locked. A few doorbell rings and goodbyes later, I was showered, packed and waiting for Kelly while she attempted to put her sneakers in her pack (an unsuccessful mission to say the least).

Our taxi was waiting outside the hotel for us but since it was only 6:25, the taxi driver decided that he wouldn't be able to leave yet. We had, after all, arranged our taxi to depart at 6:30. So, after letting us in to the car, he went back in to the hotel, sat down and chatted to the manager until it was "time" to leave. I slept for the entire taxi ride and would have continued if Kelly hadn't poked me several times to wake up.

Checking in with the incompetent China Southern people for our flight to Guilin via Guangzhou took a good 45 minutes. There were 2 people in front of us in line. Customs and Emigration went by in a breeze and then there was Duty Free shopping. While we waited for our flight to board, I fell asleep again on top of my carry-on. Once again, Kelly poked me awake and we boarded. Yet again, I fell asleep for the entire flight only to be poked awake by Kelly (by this time, I was developing a bruise on my upper right arm).

We collected our bags in Guangzhou and began our 9 hour stopover at the airport. While we ate McDonald's for lunch (I know! I haven't eaten an actual McDonald's meal in who knows how long but that was a damn good fillet-o-fish), we debated going into the city but quickly voted against this idea as we had our full packs and knowing China, would probably end up stranded somewhere leading us to miss our flight to Guilin. Instead, we explored the gigantic Guangzhou airport, complete with shopping mall, restaurants, more floors than we could count, and presumably a swimming pool if we had looked hard enough.

After lugging our packs around for awhile, Kelly suggested making an attempt to check our bags and for once, China was on our side. Bags checked we joined the other exhausted Chinese travellers and camped out (I napped) on some benches in the shopping mall. After the Air Con got to be too much, we headed up to see if we could check in for our flight. Score 2 for Sar-Kel, China 0! Bags checked, passengers checked, we found more benches and slept for another 2 hours. (Kelly swears she didn't sleep, but I saw the drool stains on the upholstery.)

The next 5 hours flew by in a breeze of finding our correct gate (we had randomly chosen a gate based on the fact that there was another China Southern flight flying out of there), eating much too expensive Chinese airport food (read: fried lettuce, scrambled eggs and fried tomatoes), and making a concerted attempt to finish off The Satanic Verses.

After such a successful day, my first 'Welcome Back to China' moment occurred moments before boarding the plane to Guilin. I came out of the stall in the toilet and made for the soap dispenser at the sinks. The woman in front of me decided that she had to use the soap at that exact moment and cut me off of both soap and sink. I manoeuvred around her, got soap and moved to the middle sink. As I started washing my hands, I noticed that she could work her motion-sensor sink. I smirked and continued washing. Then before I knew what was happening, she looked at me and started washing her hands with my water in my sink, literally pushing my hands out of the way. Thanks, China.

2 hours later, Kelly and I were in Guilin and setting our alarm clocks to catch the bus to Yangshuo.

Angry Sara: A Story from Angkor Wat

2007-07-28T20:38:00.000+08:00

Preface: All hawkers in Cambodia talk with the most drawn out vowels in the whiny-est voice you can imagine. Every souvenir is a doooooooollleeeeeeeeeer. Every soda is a dooooolllllleeeeeer. And every other imaginable consumable good is a dooolllllllller.

At the end of the first day of touring the temples of Angkor, I was about to lose my mind. Then, just as we were about to see Angkor Wat, it started to pour. And by pour I mean, my umbrealla was completely and utterly useless. This is the point where the plastic raincoat hawkers came out.

Raincoat Hawker: Want to buuuuuuy a raaaaiiiiiiincooooooaaaat.
Me: NO!!!!!
Raincoat Hawker: Whyyyyyyyyyyy?
Me: (Quite literally screaming at the woman) BECAUSE I'M ALREADY WET!!!

Behind me, Kelly was busting from laughing so hard and the raincoat hawker just about fell over too as I stomped away looking for our cyclo driver.

Stories from Halong Bay

2007-07-28T12:45:00.000+08:00

After a fantastic 3 day boat tour of Halong Bay it took a good 36 hours of taxi's, planes and buses to get me to my current location - Yangshuo.

Halong Bay (a.k.a. Ixnay on the Iet Cong Vay)
Kelly and I woke up much too early last Monday morning to be picked up by a swanky mini-van which took us from Hanoi to Halong City. Here we would board the "Imperial Junk" - the boat that would be our home for the next 3 days as we cruised around Halong Bay.

The mini-van ride to Halong City seemed exceptionally long since I was stuck in a middle seat, third row from the front, between Kelly and an 18 year old Dutch kid. At the rest stop mid-way through the drive, I turned to Kelly, completely exhausted and said, "You've got to switch with me. I. am. going. to. die". And so I slept for the next hour and a half with my face pressed up against the window, mouth open and perhaps (so someone may have said), drooling.

When we finally arrived at the ship, both Kelly and I were glad we splurged for the 80USD option. We were met with white linen table cloths, wine glasses, wicker chairs and a "sumptuous seafood lunch" (not really all that sumptuous). Two American guys joined us at our table and spent the next 40 minutes wondering where their passports had been taken. Kelly and I, much too used to randomly handing our passports over to strangers, sat back and laughed to ourselves at our nervous neighbors.

After lunch, the boat took off (our passports somewhere on the boat with the captain?), and we headed out on the bay towards some sort of cave. While inside the cave (I'm really not sure why we were in a cave), Kelly and I spotted both visions of Santa, Buddha, and Jesus. Both the Americans got in on our Jesus sightings and this led us to losing our tour group.

American #1: Well, they're either up there... or down there...
Kelly: The odds are 50/50 really.

We eventually reunited with the group and boated to a white-sandy beach for swimming followed by the boat docking for the night in the middle of Halong. The evening was spent drinking beers on the top deck of the boat with the Americans (who both turned out to be much cooler than our initial-passport-panic impression) and two Danish girls. Definitely a good end to a long day.

The next day was spent biking, kayaking and beaching and the evening was spent on Cat Ba island in a swanky hotel (again, excellent choice on the $80.00 option). The Americans, Kelly and I all headed out for beers along the boardwalk and ended up at a terrible 'Western' bar where the drinks were bad and the service was worse.

American #2: Um, can I have Bailey's, milk and ice?
Server: Uhh...
American #2: You know, Bailey's. Milk. And ice.
Server: You want have Barley's. Meelk. And iiice?
American #2: Yes, Bailey's. Milk. And ice.

We spent the following day travelling from Halong Bay, to Halong City and then back to Hanoi. When American #1 fell asleep on the bus with mouth in full fly catching position, Kelly and I both decided he's my soul mate and are currently planning the wedding.

After arriving back in Hanoi, we found there was no more rooms at the hotel we had already booked and were shuttled off to a less-than-clean over-flow hotel down the street. Met up with the Americans for dinner and then headed to the airport at 6:30am for our flight back to China.

There was something I was suppose to blog about...

2007-07-22T22:14:00.000+08:00

But I can't for the life of me remember what it was.

It could have been about surviving 30 hours on a Vietnamese bus, with men attaching hammocks to my seat at the very very back of the bus. Or, if could have been about the other men who slept in the aisle of the bus and wouldn't wake up when we stopped for bathroom stops so that everyone had to step over them. Or, maybe it was about renting a hotel room for 4 hours in the middle of the day between bus 2 and bus 3 because it was that hot in Hue and there was really nothing more than I wanted to do other than sleep on a bed and not upright in a chair. Or, it could have been about seeing Ho Chi Minh's mausoleum today and how the cyclo driver helped Kelly and I cut in line after they closed the line up to everyone else and then got us in relatively quickly. Or, perhaps about just how creepy Ho Chi Minh's body looks. But, I think there might have been something else.

Nha Trang

2007-07-18T21:49:00.000+08:00

I'm in an internet cafe sitting next to a girl playing some kind of dancing video game. It seems you have to imitate the 'dancers' "moves" with the arrow keys. It sounds like this: type type type type type type SMASH! as she hits the shift key to make the dancers do... something... and then again: type type type type type type SMASH! type type type type type type SMASH! type type type type type type SMASH! type type type type type type SMASH!
I'm beginning to inadvertently cringe every time.

The past few days in a short list:
1. I'm burnt. Bad. Really bad. I maybe did not wear sunscreen on a cloudy morning while sitting outside reading on a lounge chair in my bathing suit. It hurts.
2. I went out a boat tour to the islands around Nha Trang. At one point, a Vietnamese man, who strongly resembled Animal from the muppets, jumped into the water on a floating ring, and started serving pineapple and Vietnamese red wine to everyone else who jumped in after on inner tubes. I most definitely jumped in after.
3. Tomorrow at 6:00pm I leave for a 24+ hour boat ride to Hanoi. Check a map. It's far. Like over half the country far.

And a story from back in Laos.
It was my first time charging my ipod with its USB adapter. I though I was doing everything right but it wasn't charging for some reason. Kelly came over to help.
Kelly: Why don't you turn it upside down? (Meaning: turn the USB adapter upside down so it better fits into the rickety plug)
Me: You mean like this? (Turning my ipod upside down)
Kelly: Um, no.

2007-07-10T18:47:00.000+08:00

Phnom Penh
(For whatever reason, this computer won't let me use the title box)

Arrived in Phnon Penh around 6:00pm two nights ago to the worst guesthouse yet. A long corridor that looked straight out of a gang movie, a small room with two beds that had two dilapidated foam mattresses, and a bathroom that was a corrugated plastic wall around a tile floor with a drain. All for $10.00 a night.

Kelly and I quickly set off on the hunt for somewhere cleaner and much less expensive. After looking at a few places for $4.00 a night and in much better condition than the first, we dropped our bags and went out for dinner/searching for other places for the next 2 nights. The place that we had chosen wasn't so bad (it could have been bearable for longer) but the cold-water-only shower and dirty (dirty) mosquito netting combined with the excessive amount of mosquito bites I got during dinner, the giant heat rash on my back from the long (6 or 7 hour) bus ride during the day and the fact that I haven't stopped sweating for 3 weeks, I was at my breaking point. The next day (yesterday), Kelly and I moved on up in the world and are now paying $15.00 for an air conditioned room, which has a shower that is the same size as the bathrooms in the other places (not to mention that it's enclosed and not just a shower head over the bathroom floor) AND the best part - there's cable TV with OPRAH!

Today was spent seeing the Killing Fields of Choeung Ek and the Tuol Sleng Museum, a former high school turned into a prison (detention and torture center) by Pol Pot's security forces. It was a pretty intense day, to say the least.

2007-07-07T19:44:00.000+08:00

Arrived in Cambodia 2 days ago via 2 very turbulent flights. Yesterday and today were filled with seeing the temples of Angkor and drinking more than enough extra cold (China, take note) Angkor beer.

Tomorrow is off to Phnom Penh for a few days and then to Vietnam.

Boats, Malaria and Waterfalls

2007-06-30T20:40:00.000+08:00

The morning started off at a way too early 6:30am. After showering and breakfast Kelly and I made our way downstairs to meet our tour guide from Green Lao (a super amazing eco-tourism company here). After an hour and 40 minutes in the truck on route to the National Protected Area at Pho Khua Khuay (that may or may not be spelled correctly), we made our way down to the river where we met our other tour guide - a spindly old Lao man who was native to the area.

I looked over the bank to see them dragging the 'small boat' out of the water. It was about 3 feet wide at its widest and about 12 feet long. The second tour guide was swinging it from side to side to get all of the water out of it while also rigging up the outboard motor. Since most of my boating (and subsequent capsizing) fears were overcome last year in Thailand, I figured this would be nothing.

All started out well as we raced down the river with lush greenery surrounding on each side. A few tree branches had to be dodged but everything was going well until we started hitting the upstream currents. And then we hit rock. And then the next thing I know guide number 1 is telling us to take off our shoes because we're going to be walking through the shallow rapids.

As the founding member of the falling up stairs club, this was excellent news. Fortunately, the guides were excellent and literally held my hand the entire time. Unfortunately, I managed to cut the bottom of my foot (small but deep).

After traversing the rapids, shoes were retied and we hiked an hour through the forest. This was the point where I sincerely regretted not taking my malaria meds and tried to figure out how they could medivac me back to Canada once I came down with the malaria.

The hour of trekking was met with a fantastic waterfall, swimming and lunch made by our guides. When we returned to the village after lunch, a group of old Lao men (who were already drunk) tried to get Kelly and I drunk on BeerLao and some kind of clear spirit from a Pepsi bottle. We politely declined.

Tomorrow off to VangVieng for tubing down the Mekong River!

Oh boys

2007-06-29T19:04:00.000+08:00

So I, uh, took a weaving course today and may have spent over 2 hours at a loom, shoes off and contemplating what kind of granola I'd eat for breakfast tomorrow and what kind of Birks I'd like to buy when I get home.

Yeah, I know.

There always has to be something

2007-06-28T21:53:00.000+08:00

I was going to write about the adventures of exploring temples in a downpour, Fanta-belly, the absurd herbal sauna and the massage by a small Lao man but instead I just received an e-mail from the recruiting company in Korea saying that there are problems with my documents. Problems which should not have occurred if the Canadian office kept in any kind of contact with the Korean office.

I have a sick feeling that I may be back in Canada for longer than I was anticipating.

On a lighter note (and the fact that the internet cafe has air con):
Today, Kelly and I travelled by public bus to Buddha Park (a park with numerous Buddha statues). Travelling by public bus is always an adventure and this time was no exception. After about an hour of bone jarring under-construction-road, we pulled up to the Laos-Thai Friendship Bridge. I looked at Kelly, Kelly looked at me, we looked at the other foreigners on the bus, checked to make sure we had our passports and concluded that Buddha Park was actually in Thailand.

When we got off the bus to check, the English speaking bus driver (there is so much English and French in Laos it's incredible!) told us that Buddha Park was actually 7km away. We got back on the bus and it turned around and headed back (in the direction of Laos) to Buddha Park. Like I said, always an adventure.

Kuming to Vientiane

2007-06-26T19:24:00.000+08:00

After arriving in Kunming at 7:00am via the over night train from Dali it was time for more sleep. Except, it was too early to check into the room. So, Kelly and I ordered breakfast from the hostel cafe and hung out until about 9:00am when the very friendly front desk girl told us the room was ready. The rest of the day was spent napping and walking to Walmart for water and tissue. Kelly was sick and I was exhausted after not sleeping all that well on the mini-bed they call a hard sleeper.

That day set the tone for our time in Kunming. A whole lot of relaxing and sleeping in. The one day we did venture out (yesterday) was to the stone forest (literally, a 'forest' of karst rocks). The trip to the stone forest took about 2 hours in a mini-bus that smoked gasoline the whole time. The Stone Forest was close to $20.00 CAD to get in and was, for the most part, a big disappointment. The "highlight" of the day was getting lost among karst and caverns in the middle of a thunder and lightning storm.

Today, the flight to Laos was quite possibly the worst flight I've flown in the past 18 months. Maybe 5 minutes after take off the plane dipped and dove for a good 5-7 minutes. For the first time in my flying history I ripped open the air sickness bag and popped 2 gravol. After passing out somewhere between in flight drinks and the seat belt sign going off, I woke up rather dazed and confused in Vientiane. Going through customs was rather difficult because the gravol still hadn't worn off and I felt like I could curl up in the corner and sleep for a few days.

After arriving in the city from the airport, Kelly and I dumped our stuff at our hostel and made for food and Beerlao at the first delicious cafe we found. There were so many Western vegetarian items on the menu (over 3 pages!!!) I felt like I had died and gone to food heaven. After a half of a Beerlao (combined the gravol), I stumbled around the city in a daze.

Now, Beerlao and gravol both worn off, I'm in a sketchy internet cafe paying 100 kip/minute. To make the currency make sense I have to convert it to American dollar, then convert back to Chinese renminbi, and then double check with Kelly to make sure I did the math right. I'll either go broke by the end of the week or have a small fortune upon my return home.

Lijiang, Dali: The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

2007-06-22T21:26:00.001+08:00

Internet access has been plentiful over the past few days but time has not been on my side. So in order to make the most out of my free internet at my hostel in Dali (where Kelly noticed a man looking at full on Chinese porn last night), I'm going to combine the past week into one mega-post.

The Good
Arrived in Lijiang without any difficulties and found the hostel fairly quickly. On the bus ride to the city from the airport, there was a man with a mini-computer (literally a screen displaying windows about the size of a hardcover book) blasting Bon Jovi. Kelly and I fully rocked out in the back of the bus with air guitar and microphones. There is video to prove it.
The two days in Lijiang were spent exploring the old city (not nearly as commercial as other old cities I've been to here) and biking out to a small village nearby. On route to the village we stopped at a Chinese tea factory/tourist trap where Kelly and I went to the WC. Since there were no doors and only half walls between squatters, Kelly stood with her back to me while I went to the toilet. And I did them same for her. While I was standing there, we were chatting about what would do later in the day and then all of the sudden I felt something wet on my leg.
Kelly: I think we should go to -
Me: DUDE! You just peed on me!!
And there wasn't a sink with soap in sight.

Tiger Leaping Gorge
We met up with two Australian girls and headed for Tiger Leaping Gorge after the two days in Lijiang. It was the hardest hiking I've done so far with one part, called the '28 Bends', which is literally 28 bends of rocky trail straight up the mountain side. It was made amusing by the band of Americans with walky-talkies that we kept passing/who passed us. At the halfway point, there was a hostel on the mountain face which was stunning (stay tuned for pictures). Went to bed around 9:00pm and was hiking again by 8:30am with the sorest feet I've ever had - they're still recovering.

Dali
After hoping on a 3 hour bus ride at the end of the trail, Kelly and I returned to Lijiang to pick up our packs, eat some dinner and head off to catch our bus to take us to Dali. This bus came complete with free water, yellow cloth gift bags, and an on-route - Terminator 3. Today was filled with a trip to the biggest market in Yunnan - more produce than you could shake a stick at and toilets that make the top 10 for worst toilets in China. While the market was big and sprawling and made for great photos, it was mainly produce so we only stayed for an hour or so before we made our way back to Old Dali and the 3 pagodas. Entrance to the pagodas was 121 RMB - quite a chunk of my daily budget but it was well worth it with beautiful temples, well kept grounds and the nicest western toilets I've seen in China.

The Bad
I've been having some serious stomach/digestion issues since leaving Shanghai. After 18 months here, it's some how when I'm leaving that I develop problems, go figure. That aside, the only other hitch in the road has been the hostel that we're staying in here in Dali. They provide free mosquito coils but not air con/fans. Free internet, but dudes looking at porn. So far the staff haven't been that great and the toilet in our room is a shit-and-shower - a squatter toilet with the shower over it. Hey, why waste time?! Ai yah.

The Ugly
Due to the aformentioned stomach problems, I've kept a keen eye out for all toilets. During our trek along the Tiger Leaping Gorge the only toilet available at the hostel we stayed at face the outdoors with a door on one side and only had a half-wall along the side the faced the outdoors. So, when I went to the toilet in the morning, I made sure to check that there was no one was around. I ducked down, did my business but when I stood up to pull my pants up, I heard "Oh! Hello. Um, Goodmorning." I had forgotten that you could see the toilets from along the path from the door rooms and just at the second I stood up, one of the Americans was coming out from the dorms. It was a full moon at 7:30am. I bolted from the toilets and back to my room and avoided looking at him at breakfast. Definitely top 10 mortifying-Sara-moments.

Oh, and someone spit on me today. Again.

All and all, it's been quite the adventure so far!

Leavin' on a Jet Plane

2007-06-17T01:31:00.000+08:00

I'm leaving tomorrow for 6 weeks of travelling.

First stop: Lijiang for an interesting city and a jumping point for a 3 day trek at Tiger Leaping Gorge.

Then to Dali, Kunming and flying to Laos. Then, Cambodia, Vientnam and back to China to Guilin and Yangshuo. Then back to Shanghai on July 31 then to Canada.

Stay tuned for the adventures.

Blogspot Down Again

2007-06-12T21:31:00.001+08:00

This is really only to say that I can't read Blogspots right now but I'm hoping that once I get to Laos I'll hopefully be able to catch up on your comments.

5 days left in Shanghai!

In the News

2007-06-07T20:13:00.000+08:00

First of all, an embarrassing confession. I've become one of those foreigners. I go to Starbucks just about every day because it's so damn close to my school and I would rather shell out the money for Starbucks coffee and food than eat at the school cafeteria. I have my reasons but that would be another post entirely.

So, today, as I made my way to Starbucks, I grabbed the Shanghai Daily. Generally, I don't read newspapers in Shanghai because the writing is so poor that it makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a spoon. But, today I need the newspaper to make wands to play a game of 'Harry Potter' with my grade 3 class. So, as I ate lunch at Starbucks I made my way through the paper.

One top feature was how parents are buying Ritalin for their children so they'll be better able to focus during the upcoming college entrance exams. Although doctors are refusing to prescribe it to these non-ADD/ADHD children (gasp! shock! outrage!), parents are asking their friends to refill their ADD/ADHD-child's prescription multiple times so there are extra pills to give to the entrance-examination-students.

The article ends by stating:
"I don't want to see my child lag behind others even though it's a bit risky to have the medicine," said a mother surnamed Liu. "I used to hesitate, but now getting a high score is the top priority."

Unfortunately, I don't think the Shanghai Daily was intentionally being witty by ending with this quote.

Full link here

More From: The Teaching Strategy of the Primary School English Open Type Study

2007-06-06T19:20:00.000+08:00

"The teacher uses to enrich colorful, the comment of just right to the student's study behavior, study result and respond make an actively sexual evaluation, encourage a student with greater of enthusiasm throw in to go in the study." (My own empasis)

And here I thought that was illegal.

Potato

2007-06-05T19:01:00.000+08:00

This is one of my favorite grade 6 students. His name is Potato because, as he himself said, he looks like a potato. He also talks with a bit of a lisp and his Dad is either French (Parisian) or French-Canadian (Ottawa-ian) or some combination of both. He cracks me up.

Things That Make You Go "Oooh!"

2007-06-03T22:15:00.000+08:00

I knew where I wanted to go but I wasn't sure what I wanted. I walked into the store and spotted the black Jimmy Choo bag that I had eyed a few times before but I wanted access to the backroom. I wanted Dior and Vuitton too. I looked around, pretending to be interested in the Tods and and the Coach. Finally, I heard the magic words, "What you want?"

I turned around and whispered, "Louis Vuitton"

He said, "You come to my secret room"

After digging through piles of Channel, Vuitton and Dior, and chatting about being an English teacher in Shanghai, I decided that I just didn't really like any of the bags and started heading back down the ladder.

(Dear Readers/Stephanie, yes, I know you are gasping in shock and horror. Don't worry, keep reading.)

As I made my way out of the door, I saw Red. She was sitting high above the rich Europeans who were "bargaining" (i.e. thinking they were getting a good deal because the Euro is worth so freaking much). As they made their way out of the store, I asked the woman if she would take Red down for me. The second the woman passed her to me I knew then that I couldn't leave the store with her.

Strong metal chain, real leather (well, as far as this vegetarian can tell), strong zipper and ID card inside. It was a match made in heaven. Then I asked the price.

I knew it would be high because it was better quality than most of the other bags ("Korea Quality" as opposed to "China Quality"... if this is true, I'm going to go freaking broke next year). The girl started at 1000 kuai. I said 200.

After a good 20 minutes of bargaining we finally came to 375 final price. Seeing as she was going to let me walk away without it (damn those Europeans! They paid 4000 for 6 bags), I knew I would have to shell out more than I wanted.

As I walked out of the store, I felt a little faint for spending that much on a fake but I know that I'll love her forever (or, at least until next season).

My Father Always Told Me

2007-05-31T22:15:00.000+08:00

My father always told me that everyone in the world was different. Some were rich and some were poor, some were tall and some were short, some lived in the country and some lived in the city. But, he'd always finish, everyone pulls down there pants and goes to the bathroom the same way.

Well Dad, with all the life lessons that you were bang-on about, it's this one that I've finally proven you wrong on.

JinCai School - Teacher's WC

PuMing School Trough-Style WC.

(I still haven't found the "teacher's toilets" yet.)

Somewhere along the YangZi River there's a Taoist Temple.

These are the toilets they provided for visitors.

Bicycle Love (Or: What China Does to You After a Year)

2007-05-30T18:49:00.000+08:00

I first noticed him about a month ago when I was biking home from school. I was making my best stab at getting up the hill on my one-speed bike and he came flying over the hill in my direction on a multi-speed bike. I did a double take - Another laowai on DongFang Lu on a bike?! Impossible!

Then I saw him a week later and knew it was love. We were biking laowais. It was clearly meant to be. I pictured our wedding, the kids we would have, how we would take them to China and show them where we met one fateful day... and then I almost ran into a poll. I focused back on the road.

Lately, I haven't seen him around. I was beginning to think he had been seeing another bicycle. He had clearly forgotten about me and moved on. I was sad but I knew there would be new bikers in my future.

Then, today, I saw him again. I was taking the easy route on the road and he went up over the bridge. He was clearly trying to play it cool and show off his bike. He wanted me back and was trying not to show it. I looked his way to let him know I'd consider it. We are meant to be together, afterall.

The Goings On

2007-05-28T22:11:00.000+08:00

Friday:

While talking to a friend about his posted YouTube videos and trying to figure out if his recently-ex-ladyfriend-ex-friend was a pole dancer or not (she's not), Kelly comes running into the room and asks if I can 'hear that'. I couldn't. The next thing I know, she runs out into the apartment complex (she's in pajamas) and comes back 5 minutes later to get a chair and demand my help.

I trek outside cursing under my breath (every day I become more like my father) about what the crap she was doing and how I still wasn't certain about the pole dancer, only to hear the loudest kitten meows I've ever heard. Kelly points to the awning covering the door to the building next door. "There's a kitten up there" she says, "And I can't reach it."

So there I was at 7:00pm on Friday night, attempting to get a cat down off a roof. I wasn't tall enough to reach the kitten, it was just a little too high, but I was eventually able to raise a plastic tray of cat food high enough for the cat to start eating it. Then, as I slowly moved it away, she fell into it and I was able to lower her to the ground. All this while various Chinese families walked by and wondered if the laowais were breaking into apartments.

Kelly named her Zoë and has been bathing, feeding and generally loving her back to health. I've been letting her play with my slippers from time to time but have been generally useless in the cat-caring process. It's pretty amazing how much Kelly loves animals. Since Friday, she's gone out and bought special shampoo, taken the little squeaker to the vet, gotten her medicine and a cat-carrier and is working out the details for her adoption from the local SPCA type organization. It's unfortunate not everyone in China loves animals this much.

Saturday:

After the events of Friday, I stuck around the apartment and prepared for the Cranium game that was going to take place. In first semester, there were some hard-core Cranium players that ventured to our place every month or so. This was the first game that's taken place since all the buddies have returned home and it just wasn't the same without them. Kyle wasn't there to explain all the rules, so we had to make some of them up. Hana and Jody weren't there to get distracted and flip through magazines and Jason (well, he's still in Shanghai but we already had too many players) wasn't there to tag-team with Kyle and win the game in 10 minutes flat.

Sunday:

Spent all afternoon planning the summer trip. I'm considering buying out the last week of my contract to gain some more travel time.

The Teaching Strategy of the Primary School English Open Type Study

2007-05-25T20:04:00.000+08:00

Today, while I was waiting in the 'Foreign Teachers' Lounge' (the school's photocopying/meeting room) of the school that I teach Grade 1 at on Friday afternoons (Grade 1 students, 1 class a week, Friday afternoon. You do the math on how much fun this is.), one of the Chinese English teachers came up to me and asked what the word was to describe the colors red, blue and yellow. Her electronic translator had told her it was '3 dollars colors' and she had the feeling that that was not correct. I explained the term primary colors and that orange, green and purple were considered 'secondary colors'. She went on to further explain that she was writing an article and asked if I would mind reading it and helping her with it. Thinking that it might be a one page article, I agreed.

She then brought out five, single spaced, 10 point font, pages of 'article'. I gritten my teeth and started to read.

"The so-called English open type teaching is extensively under the instruction which points in the modern science result system, information to talk about and control a theory, absorb various strength of concrete teaching method and be free from time, space and teaching material limit, the application of creation is at the English classroom teaching process.This kind of teaching method emphasizes to take student as center, from pay attention to a knowledge induction to pay attention to fulfillment ability development;From pay attention to education to change direction to pay attention to education process as a result, attain English classroom teaching thus of all-directions open."

After skimming the opening paragraph, I asked if she could e-mail it to me and I would be able to send it back to her by the end of the weekend.

This comes after I spent most of last week editing a Chinese friend's 'thesis' (12 page paper) on male-relationships in The Kite Runner. Apparently I have a sign on my back that I haven't noticed which states how much I love editing Chinglish.

Gah!

U.N Coloring Therapy

2007-05-24T20:52:00.001+08:00

On my to do list from last week:
Bring paper and colors for Israel and Tutankhamen

The humidex has been reading 95% and the Weather Network told me that it felt like 41 degrees Celsius today. Going outside is like stepping into a sauna.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Store

2007-05-22T20:19:00.000+08:00

I was beginning to worry that nothing interesting or funny had been happening lately and I that I hadn’t been posting very much. Fortunately, China never lets me down.

Today went as any regular teaching day tends to go. Some classes were good; some classes were rowdy. Some classes had brilliant students; other classes had students who were less inclined to learn English. But none of it really mattered because I was meeting a bunch of friends for dinner at the Smart Noshery so I knew the day would turn out well in the end.

And it did.
Dinner was great, the food was amazing as usual and there was lots of hilarious conversation with recaps of the antics from Saturday night.

That would be a pretty boring story if I ended it there, eh?

Kelly and I biked home and were followed by two men who took every chance to stare and us and attempt to converse with us (they were also on their own bikes). We smiled and yelled ‘Zai Jian!’ as we turned the corner and they biked on.

The real action started when we decided to stop at the store for ice cream before going home. I pulled up my bike, got out my keys to lock it, the men selling DVDs were staring. All was a usual ice cream buying night.

Then, I felt something wet on my leg. I thought it was an air conditioner drip so I went to wipe it away but as I did I felt the texture – slimy – not your usual air conditioner drip wetness.

I immediately put my bag down and begin searching for a tissue, Kelly asked what was happening and told her I need a tissue right now. She helped me get one out of my bag and while doing so took a closer look at what was on my leg. And then she gasped. Literally, hands over her mouth, eyes wide gasping.

“Don’t freak out,” she started, “but I think someone hawked a loogie while we were biking and it landed on your leg.”

So there I stood, in the entrance of the LianHua grocery store, wiping someone else’s mucus and spittle off of my left calf and trying to not gag.

China: Never fails you for a good story.

Ain't dat de truf

2007-05-15T19:26:00.000+08:00

"I can't believe he's married"
"Who else is married?"
"Lots of people are married"
"Why aren't I married?"
"Probably because you're wearing a see-through wife-beater and are eating a chocolate brownie."

The Oriental Pearl TV Tower

2007-05-13T20:07:00.000+08:00

Before coming to Shanghai, I was excited at the prospect of going to the top of the Oriental Pearl TV tower. There's really no good reason for the excitement. I'm not particularly found of heights and the structure isn't especially aesthetically pleasing (some have referred to it as an alien anal probe) but I figured that since it seems to be such a symbol of Shanghai, I couldn't leave the city without going up. And so I did.

To kick off the Jen-Sean-birthday-weekend extravaganza, a few of us went up, up, up to the middle ball and looked around, then went up a short staircase to the revolving restaurant and after dinner we explored the top ball.

Waiting for the elevator to the top ball, a woman decided that she had to be the first one on to the elevator. I stood my ground, elbows out, and was determined that she did not have to be the first on. When the doors opened, Sean, who was in front of me, stepped back so as to block the woman and ushered the rest of us on. Yet even as we made our way on to the elevator, the woman bombarded our line of defense and made sure she was on the elevator. What she didn't account for was the rest of her friends not being able to get on. After she looked around at all the Westerner faces that surrounded her and saw that her friends were still outside, she pushed and shoved her way off of the elevator.

After this adventure, we poked around the top ball, took some photos and called it a day.

Charades and Bike Escapades

2007-05-10T21:23:00.000+08:00

Number 1:
When you live life completely illiterate and unable to fully communicate with people, you become exceptionally good at charades.

Tonight, I stopped into the good DVD store by The Smart Noshery Makes You Slobber to see if they had any KTV* DVDS.

I 'Ni hao''d the woman behind the table of DVDs and said "KTV?" She looked confused.
Kelly and I looked at each other and immediately began to mime people singing into microphones like it was an every day occurrence. She said she didn't have American KTV but she did have Chinese KTV.

We both left the store falling over laughing at our excellent rendition of KTV.

*Karaoke Television. If you're not on my msn list, I recently found out that our apartment has a karaoke machine. All this time I just thought it was a VCR.

Number 2:
With the weather becoming increasingly warmer (this past week hasn't gone below 25 degrees Celsius), I've been wearing an increasing amount of skirts. Since I refuse to stop riding my bike, some migrant workers have gotten an eyeful when the wind has picked up.

HuangShan

2007-05-07T23:33:00.000+08:00

I climbed the Yellow Mountain on Saturday. A good 10Km or more of stone stairs that go up forever. I saw 3 other foreigners the whole time I was on the mountain. A French man trekking up like I was and two other guys walking down the mountain with their Chinese lady-friends after taking the cable car to the top. Nearly every person I passed on the way up nudged their friend and noted the laowai on the trail. And gasp! She's a Jianada ren! (Canadian)
About 0.5km from the top, with my patience wearing thin, I turned to Kelly and said not-so-quietly said, "Ah! Zhongguo ren!" (Chinese)

Lancun Lu at Night

2007-05-02T21:54:00.000+08:00

A block or so away from my apartment is a great street with restaurants and shops and a million street vendors. I'm still working on my video-skills and you can hear Kelly ask me what I'm photographing but all in all a little slice of my evening.

Shanghai Day

2007-05-02T10:11:00.000+08:00

Street Vendors in an old section of town on FangBang Lu

Roast Chicken for Sale

The Car Barn. Where you park your Mustang.

My favorite restaurant.
(The owner speaks English and French quite well.)

On Taking Bad Medicine

2007-04-29T21:07:00.000+08:00

We're discussing films in grade 6 this month so today I brought in 'Little Miss Sunshine' and showed my students the clip where the family has to push the Volkswagen bus to start it running again. However, I showed them the whole clip with no sound. They had to decide what had happened to the bus, what the family was saying and where they were going.

The one student who had already seen the movie chatted with me while the rest of the class worked.

Grade 6 Boy: Sara, I don't understand why the grandfather dies in the film.
Me: Well, I think he was very old.
Grade 6 Boy: Yes, but...
Me: I think he also maybe, um.... drank a lot of alcohol when he was young so he was not healthy.
Grade 6 Boy: Oh, but... [pause] but he also... [the student mimes snorting cocaine]
Me: Oh! [Nervous laughter] Um, well. He took some drugs, some, um, bad medicine. Yes, he took some bad medicine. The kind that people shouldn't take and it isn't very healthy and that is why he died.
Grade 6 Boy: Oh, okay. So he wasn't healthy.
Me: No, he wasn't.
Grade 6 Boy: Okay, thank you teacher.

Next week I'm only showing Disney cartoons.

2007-04-26T22:32:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, at my morning school, I noticed the students, teachers, and maintenance staff setting up the school for some sort of event but I wasn't sure what. At lunch, when the school played Aqua's "Mr. Jones" over the P.A. system, I figured something was up. In my class after lunch, the students explained that the school was putting on an 'Arts Exhibition' for parents and teachers from other schools.

This morning I made sure to pack my camera.

The following videos were taken during the rehearsal for the 'Exhibition'. Unfortunately, I had to leave to go to my second school before the whole show started.
Here the school listens to the director give instructions about how they will cheer at certain parts of the presentation and do some other things which I couldn't quite understand. And here the students practice their dance moves.

And the antics continue...

2007-04-25T21:17:00.000+08:00

I'm currently in day 3 of 8 straight teaching days and things are rapidly deteriorating.

I said "Home Alone".
Kelly heard "Homo Loan". As in, rent a gay buddy for a day.

(This happened about 15 minutes ago and I'm still laughing.)

Overheard in Apartment 103

2007-04-24T21:37:00.000+08:00

We don't have a knife... so we're breaking this bread Jesus style.

Reason 3467 Why I Always Should Carry a Camera

2007-04-23T20:58:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, while coming out of the condiments aisle and heading towards the fruit and vegetables section in Wal-Mart, I heard the blaring sounds of a Mado-pop version of the Backstreet Boys. I looked over to see 2 girls wearing, what can only be described as, blue fish-net body suits with red shorts and nude bandeau-style tops underneath. This New-York-Fashion-Week combination was accompanied by matching white pleather hats. As I stood there, slack-jawed and staring at their clothing, they suddenly broke out into a carefully coordinated dance routine to promote some kind of healthy nut.

Just another Sunday trip to the grocery store.

A Few Observations

2007-04-22T10:17:00.000+08:00

After my angry last post, I'm beginning to think that come June it will be time to leave China (minus the 2 weeks of travelling though). Things that used to make me smile and laugh now make me bitter and scowl. But maybe it's just been a bad week.

On another note: I've become increasingly aware of other Western's behaviours and attitudes. We're a pretty loud and obnoxious bunch.

Over the past week, I've had dinner with two different groups of (fairly-newly-arrived in Shanghai) friends and sat there stunned at their crass language (I mean, we all know I drop an eff-bomb here or there but now I'm overly aware of it) and their attitudes towards wait-staff. It seems that the second people enter a western-style restaurant they completely forget they're in China.

It's been quite an interesting experience to say the least.

Would this happen in the West?

2007-04-17T19:56:00.000+08:00

It's things like this that really make me wish I was back home... at least I think...

The Background:
1. All schools in China have ceramic tiled halls and stairways. While aesthetically pleasing, it's ridiculously dangerous. Especially since all school children in China don't go outside to play (on the paved/tiled outdoor areas) for 'recess'; rather, they have 10 minute intervals between classes where they run screaming through the halls. This is one aspect of Chinese schools (among many) that I still haven't adjusted to.
2. Parents usually wait at the gates outside of the school to pick up their child at the end of the day. Parents are not allowed inside the school during school hours unless there is a special reason or it is a rainy day. On rainy days they are permitted to go to their child's class to meet him or her with an umbrella and, often, plastic bags to tie over their shoes/backpack/head (no joke).

The Story:
Today, to avoid collisions with students and parents coming from their classes at the end of the day, I headed to the teacher's lounge for the 10 minute interval between classes. Since it had been raining, the ceramic tile was quite slick. Many rainy days before this, I had imagined myself falling face-first down these stairs and landing on top of an unsuspecting Grandma.
Today, as luck would have it, I did no such thing. Instead, I went feet up, bottom out, down several stairs - cracking my tail bone on each and ever stair as my basket of magnets, flashcards, textbooks, markers and games went flying down the stairs in front of me. All this as a class full of parents, grandparents and students were behind me.
One grandma tried to pick me up by pinching my sleeve while all the other parents shouted "Laowai! ahahah!... [Incomprehensible Chinese] ... LAOWAI!!"
Then, not only did they continue the Laowai chant but they continued their journey down the stairs while I was sprawled out under them. There was one student who went dashing after my magnets and picked them up for me but she was the only child in the bunch who stopped. Parents, Grandparents and students stepped over, around and on top of me and all my things in the hallway as I scrambled to collect myself and my things. Language-barriers aside, not one person stopped to help.
It took every ounce of self-control I could muster not to stop and cry right there over my cracked tail-bone (still to be confirmed by a doctor) and ruined game pieces.

When I retold this story to people later in the day, they got to the punchline before I could finish the story. Common responses were:
"And let me guess, no one helped you with your things."
"And they all probably stepped over you, right?"
"And they didn't do a thing, did they."

In China (from what my friends and I have seen and experienced), everyone will stop and stare if someone is being beaten or mugged but no one will actually do anything. It's the 'survival of the fittest' mentality at its worst.

The Question:
So all of this has left me with a question: Am I just in the late stages of culture shock in thinking this would never happen at home? Is this 'Big City' mentality versus Chinese mentality? Or, are people here just that rude at times?

Tell me please, dear reader, is this story surprising or does it just sound like another account from your own day?